This post is inspired by a previous blog homework topic from a while back-
I feel like I could list out a couple important lessons that I have learned but the one that sticks out to me the most would be that it is ok to have barriers to friendship. You don’t need to allow everyone into your life just because they want to be there. Trust is important in any kind relationship so unfortunately my shield is up until I know I can trust someone. Some people will try and burn you and they can only succeed if you let them in too soon (sometimes people you trust burn you too but leave the stinging for where it matters).
I honestly feel like having barriers to friendship has kept toxic people out of my life and has only allowed room for solid friendships that develop over time. Simply watching how people treat other people, is enough to get a feel for wether or not we’re going to get along. If someone is unnecessarily rude to other people or talk shit about someone behind their back, don’t think that you’re going to be an exception. Those aren’t the types of people I want to call “friends”. I have never been one to desperately want friends or have a strong desire to go out and party with people because when I do, I just don’t feel like I connect with most people. In my life I’ve encountered a lot of dramatic, attention seeking, immature and untrustworthy people who have led me to lack trust in people until I really get to know them. I used to trust people unless given a reason not to but it has definitely changed as I became an adult.
Trust me, I’m not an asshole. This lesson has developed through life experiences. I have opened up to people too soon about mental health challenges and other things, only to have what I share be used against me or shared with people outside of the conversation. Ive had people who just want to be around me to smoke my weed, have me do their hair or past crackhead roommates who needed a place to stay but disrespect the rules of the house, personal belongings and steal shit from my house (along with plenty of other shit). So you can bet your sweet ass I am a bit reserved and don’t go sharing my personal life or letting people in with everyone I meet on the same day I meet them. People who look for quick friendships are only looking for something to gain and when they don’t, poof! Bye, bitch. Dodged that bullet.
I am always friendly and respectful. I treat other people the way I would like to be treated. I promote peace and kindness and I will always lend a helping hand when I can but when I start to see that there are ulterior motives to wanting to be friends- I remain respectful and friendly unless given a reason not to be and then I always keep my distance.
I want to surround myself with like-minded people and apparently those are hard to find in LA 🤷🏻♀️ I can definitely say I’ve met some very like minded people here on SG, and for that, I am very thankful that I know there are people I have met through here that I am comfortable talking about life challenges with.
(I didn’t intend for this post to be so long but I like to elaborate on things I feel strongly about and this is one of them).
Much love to you all 😘
@missy @rambo
