right. well, today i just fucking hate every person i have ever had a crush on. yes, that is that i have wasted today thinking about. possibly due to pms. particular targets include...
daniel: why did you cancel that date a year and a half ago? was it the weirdness of "deflowering" me, even though i'd fucked more women than you? or the fact that i was your brother's girlfriend's flatmate? regardless, you're a lawyer for fucks sake, in a dull office in the city. as your weekend girlfriend, i would have been endlessly entertaining: art, theatre, picnics and hot sex, possibly mff threesomes. that would surely make your life a lot more interesting. instead, you get back together with your ex, blonde april from theatresports at uni. as far i know though, she can only have conversations about macrobiotic food. but she's gone to france now, so i
hope you end up as booty call material, cos you has the hottest back muscles i have ever seen.
that guy at the pub that thought i was hitting on his stoned, monosyllabic friend "bj": i hope you have died from tattoo poisoning or something. when it's all kicking in to high gear and you're admiring the seams of my pantyhose, you look at me all dumb and confused and say "uh, i have a girlfriend, i thought you were into my mate". what a crushing of a girl's self esteem. what a waste of time and otherwise excellent flirtation on my part.
the south african guy in the hostel in prague: ok, i didn't even like you. and you were really unappealingly arrogant in that distinctly south african way. and i'd just had sex with that american wrestler law student guy whose name i now can't remember in a chapel the night before, so i was sated for the moment. still, you knew i was prbly up for it and you didnt even try. instead you tried to hit on the twins from canada who claimed to be virgins. puh-lease.
ex-boyfriend andrew. ANDREW. where do i start. fucker. fuck you for still being nice and funny, yet totally unavailable, emotionally and otherwise. i still want you back, but as long as you think that i will never love you again, i am happy.
mr w hotel: you would be perfect if you turned up at sydney airport with pink boxes from heathrow's agent provocateur and a couple of bottles of deeply decadent champagne, and then fucked me senseless to tom waits for a whole weekend. but you wont, because you are a coward. i'm nearly over you, but only in a way that lets me relive how fucking peeved i am by men like you in lists like this.
that's all i care to think about right now. apart from this, i'm not a bitter person. i promise.
daniel: why did you cancel that date a year and a half ago? was it the weirdness of "deflowering" me, even though i'd fucked more women than you? or the fact that i was your brother's girlfriend's flatmate? regardless, you're a lawyer for fucks sake, in a dull office in the city. as your weekend girlfriend, i would have been endlessly entertaining: art, theatre, picnics and hot sex, possibly mff threesomes. that would surely make your life a lot more interesting. instead, you get back together with your ex, blonde april from theatresports at uni. as far i know though, she can only have conversations about macrobiotic food. but she's gone to france now, so i
hope you end up as booty call material, cos you has the hottest back muscles i have ever seen.
that guy at the pub that thought i was hitting on his stoned, monosyllabic friend "bj": i hope you have died from tattoo poisoning or something. when it's all kicking in to high gear and you're admiring the seams of my pantyhose, you look at me all dumb and confused and say "uh, i have a girlfriend, i thought you were into my mate". what a crushing of a girl's self esteem. what a waste of time and otherwise excellent flirtation on my part.
the south african guy in the hostel in prague: ok, i didn't even like you. and you were really unappealingly arrogant in that distinctly south african way. and i'd just had sex with that american wrestler law student guy whose name i now can't remember in a chapel the night before, so i was sated for the moment. still, you knew i was prbly up for it and you didnt even try. instead you tried to hit on the twins from canada who claimed to be virgins. puh-lease.
ex-boyfriend andrew. ANDREW. where do i start. fucker. fuck you for still being nice and funny, yet totally unavailable, emotionally and otherwise. i still want you back, but as long as you think that i will never love you again, i am happy.
mr w hotel: you would be perfect if you turned up at sydney airport with pink boxes from heathrow's agent provocateur and a couple of bottles of deeply decadent champagne, and then fucked me senseless to tom waits for a whole weekend. but you wont, because you are a coward. i'm nearly over you, but only in a way that lets me relive how fucking peeved i am by men like you in lists like this.
that's all i care to think about right now. apart from this, i'm not a bitter person. i promise.
VIEW 14 of 14 COMMENTS
sguy_alessandro:
you are super cute......looking forward for more pictures.... 
mwillis:
Damn fools 