neslo

Great talking to you today sweetie. Currently at a friend's house working on a project but us girls are exhausted and crashing out for a bit. Yah..nap time. Anyways call my cell when you're around.

Welcome to the Wonderful world of Dating, College and Financial Instablity.....

Wow, hold on there tiger. I never said friends only and we've never been bf/gf, I have explained complications in my life which you have known about since day 1. I have never said eh want nothing to do with you or anything of that sort. I have been very honest and open with you about being hurt badly, about how I don't feel I can handle a relationship right now but that we could see how things go over time. I told you all of this long long ago before writing anything public so I find that rather unfair. What concerns me is the way you acted the other day when I talked about a guy friend...you acted very jealous and sure jealousy is normal it's part of life but on the level you put it scared me a bit since I already went through the whole jealousy of me having guys as friends thing with Kevin and you started to act that way which scared me because honestly I cannot be with a guy again who is going to act overly jealous of me having guys as friends again because frankly many of my friends are guys. That doesn't mean anything is going on more then friends even if they want it to. You are the only boy I have been physical with in all this time I have been single and if that's not good enough for you and if you don't have the patience to understand why I'm a bit on edge about relationships then fine go ahead and assume things of me and feel bad for yourself. Honey, I have done nothing wrong and was looking forward to spending time with you this weekend but now I am just in shock of your journal.

tis tragic
but yes. some of us are weak enough to break.
i almost did.
firearms or not...... vengeance is a powerful motivator and people who are frail and desperate can snap
and cause tragedies like this shit
all because of ego man.
all because of some fucks and their having to put others below them.
*grumble*
*hugs*
unbelievable.
and neonazism ugh
le sigh
i only can keep hope for a solution to such cruelty sometime in a future lifetime.

And let's not forget that he listened to Marilyn Manson..yeah he also listened to Lennon but do you think the media will say much about that? It's so sad. Miss you.

well best wishes.
my reaction is the same as yours.
at least you can tolerate them *laughs*
hehe

Do you know who something happened too?

Welsome to my world. Was freaking out over the midterm exams I had this semester. But then agian thi is my first semester back in quite seme time.

Honey honey oh what can I say. I think I had a nervous breakdown the other day. Pretty sure at that. My life was fun and then I got the flu and it sucked and then I had to move with the flu and that sucked more and then the lack of sleep from moving started causing me to have seizures. And these 2 boys in some of my classes gossip about all the girls and started saying that I'm on the internet getting fucked up the ass(complete lies) and that one of my girls gives some of the teachers head(lies..lies)And then my teachers were mad and asking for late homework but I was tired and started feeling very depressed because I worried about school and worried about my health and was worrying about everything and then I stopped and said WTF is wrong with me? And then I realized it was my new meds making me feel so sick and making me feel panicked and overly stressed so I got off those meds yesterday. Best fucking thing I've done all week. And so yesterday I emailed my teachers and said I'm not coming to school the last 2 days..I am fucking staying in bed and resting and coping with getting off these new meds. etc 'cause my doctor said for me to do just that.

I woke up today feeling happy for the first time in a long time. And I know not taking those stupid meds is a huge part of it. So today I am taking time for myself. No school, no gossip whores,no stress just down time for me because I think it's long overdue. I have to go do my servive learning project tomorrow but if you want to hang Saturday..let me know. I am free as can be.

aww, that's sweet.

Done and done.

haha ditto cutie.