You know, when your sitting in with your psychiatrist, and hes there, raised voice, telling you that you are a stupid pathetic fuck up of a girl, you wonder if he can read you mind. Yes, he called me a fuck up. He also called me a baby, and a few other things I was too busy shocked and crying over. I was appauled and just so distraut when I walked out. All Noleen could get out of me was "he swore at me".
He thinks I may be over-dosing on Lithium. Now I had talked to him about my throwing up before and even have Mum as a witness. He said I should have dropped down my dose, but argh. He told us that it wouldn't be that, and now he's yelling at me because I was doing what he said.
He told me he was gonna be a sadist and make me go for a blood test *right now*. Whiich I just slumped to, honestly, ive not kept food in since sunday, i had a blood test on Tuesday and now you want more. Blah. I just wanted to get up and walk out on him, or just yell at him, but I just sat there crying. I'm weak.
Blood test went well, I went to a place the next level down from him and I told her im petrified of needles, dad told her i had bad veins. She got dad to hold me, and I didnt feel it, but it didnt stop bleeding for like an hour.
Yeah, so I'm a fuck up. Go me.
He thinks I may be over-dosing on Lithium. Now I had talked to him about my throwing up before and even have Mum as a witness. He said I should have dropped down my dose, but argh. He told us that it wouldn't be that, and now he's yelling at me because I was doing what he said.
He told me he was gonna be a sadist and make me go for a blood test *right now*. Whiich I just slumped to, honestly, ive not kept food in since sunday, i had a blood test on Tuesday and now you want more. Blah. I just wanted to get up and walk out on him, or just yell at him, but I just sat there crying. I'm weak.
Blood test went well, I went to a place the next level down from him and I told her im petrified of needles, dad told her i had bad veins. She got dad to hold me, and I didnt feel it, but it didnt stop bleeding for like an hour.
Yeah, so I'm a fuck up. Go me.
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
burningleviathan:
awww you know you are 
francbert:
on a totally unrelated note i get happy every time i find another black head somewhere because it gives me the opportunity to squeeze the living hell out of the sucker until i can purge it from my self, then i feel all sad that the experience has passed and that i will have to wait until next time to relive it all again.