6 days...
6 stops...
6 Cities/towns...
720 Miles...
It began on Tuesday:
I picked up my travelling companion for the next 6 or so days, Pinklet and we headed off for new horizons and old haunts, friends and family. Little did we know what high adventure was to await us...*
*(Disclaimer:The author asserts only that 'high adventure' is from his point of view and other perceptions may vary.
We headed up the M32, onto the M4, then M5 and the M6. We were making good time and it was pretty nice weather.
Oh god, we're lost already! Where are we? Oh wait, that's my house we've just gone past!
Then the weather changed - a little rain. More rain. A lot of rain. Fucking fuckloads of rain. Hail. Back to the rain. We were still making good time though.
Author's note - Although there are a number of people I dislike, (mostly celebrities and one ex,) there are only 3 people I actually hate: George W. Bush, John Prescott and for some reason the third one escapes me at present. Conversely there is only one inanimate object in the world that I hate - the M6. 3 lanes of motoring hell. For some excrutiating reason, everyone drives along at 70mph for a while and then at some random point, everyone will inexplicably lower their speed to approximately 30mph for a mile or two, then speed back up to 70mph for 5-8 miles and then another random point arrives and we go back to 30. Repeat for the entirety of your journey. AAAAAAaaaaaarrrrgh!
Then we all slowed to 30mph. I was not worried, (see above,) but then we slowed to 20... 10... 5... 0. Bugger. Turns out a lorry had overturned onto it's side, blocking two lanes between junction 17 and 18. Cleverly, the police had decided not to close junction 17, meaning loads of new cars still trying to join an already clogged road. I hope everyone involved in the incident was ok.
We get to Manchester and after a quick tussle with a magic junction on the M60, that was blocked and then flung us the wrong way down the M60 after a diversion and then appeared not to be blocked after all, (See? High adventure! As long as I don't tell you the real story, which is dull beyond all reason.) we finally arrived at Ortus's house, after a quick call for directions.
We love this man.
We watched Jurassic Park 2, which yielded up more stars than I previously thought, (see Ortus's blog for more details,) and I got rather drunk. We also decided to start a new SG group, The SG Pirate sock association:
Pop out and get yourself some. Go on, you know you want to. We'll wait.
Wednesday:
We met my friend Sam at the Trafford Centre, where I picked up A Scanner Darkly and True Romance for 3 each and decided not to buy GTA IV, as I'd not be able to play it for a week anyway. We had some great crepes and waffles and found drinks called Firefly:
Which pleased me greatly, as not only am I a huge Firefly fan, but I happened to be wearing my Firefly 'Browncoats' t-shirt. Yes, I am a massive geek, as has been pointed out to me during this trip no less than 5 times.
We went back to Sam's and met her new bunnies, (she has 6,) and her cat took to Pinks immediately, which was unheard of. We ate and played Wii. I ruled at Boxing, but Pinks kicked my ass at Cow racing. We played House of the Dead and generally had fun.
Thursday:
The second leg.
We headed to Hull, for our sins. We had lunch with my Aunt and Uncle and Grandma, which was very nice, with Pinks gaining many popularity points by talking about being a seamstress, (my Aunt and Grandma both do various types of embroidery,) and having "The most lovely smiley eyes," according to my Grandma. We looked at pictures and sculptures done by my Aunt, hats by my cousin and I managed to knock out a little bit of 'Moonlight Sonata' on the piano.
Then in the afternoon we headed over to my Mum's in Grimsby. Well, technically Cleethorpes, but who really gives a shit. She got to meet my Mum, ('She's Nuts!) my stepdad Mick, my stepsister and her husband and two kids, and the dog, Jake. I got to meet my stepsister's daughter, Kaitlin, for the first time (She's 3 & this is the first time I've seen her!) and entertain her son, Kyle by teaching him to skateboard. We ended the evening with a few drinks and my mum getting tipsy and telling Pinks most of our recent family history. Sorry love.
Friday
The Third leg.
We headed down to Ely.
Chocolate cornflake cake?
Where I got to meet Pink's mum and dad, her sister and her fiance and had a great curry and a few drinks before crashing out on the sofa. I decided they were lovely people and they, in turn, didn't physically eject me from the house.
Saturday
Got to meet Pink's Grandma, who was lovely and another embroiderer and the completer of some of the most fiendishly difficult jigsaws I've ever seen.
Later, we went into Ely and met up with Pink's sister and went through the market and got yummies for a picnic. We met more of Pink's friends there and I managed to burn my head in the sun. In the evening we went drinking in Ely with pink's friends from before. I had had plans to meet a friend of mine in Cambridge, but it was going to be impossible to get there and back to Ely and spend any real time there. Next time Al.
One guy. Four girls. A shitload of alcohol. Mayhem.
Sunday
Hungover. Sunburned. Not feeling the best. Have to get up to catch a train to London. Seriously? Yup. Shit.
We manage to get a train to Kings Cross, along with Pink's sister & her fiance. Once there, we hopped on a tube to Camden. I had a slight flashback to last time, when I almost got caught with an 8th of weed in my pocket, but this time I had nothing on me, so no worries. We went to the Edinburgh Castle, (I think?) and met Doplex, Munch, Iannnnnn Jackie and ex-member Firemonkey. Many drinks followed and we spotted Paul Kaye (Dennis Pennis,) a few tables across. I talked to Iannnnnn about swopping our fingers for the feet of various animals after Munch reminded us all of how Terry Nutkins had had his fingers bitten off by his pet otter and Jackie managed to activate a death ray or a sun lamp, (we're not sure which,) above our table. I ducked out for a while to have my ears stretched up to 4mm and went back to a slightly drunk Pinks. We continued drinking and talking crap for the most part until we had to leave for the train home and a great time was had by all. Good to meet you guys, you fucking rock.
Monday
The final leg:
We got up late and just got ready in time for Pink's other Grandparents to come over. We spent the morning chatting and had lunch before packing up and setting off back home. We made it in really good time - something like 3 and a half hours. Stopping at Pink's for tea, we said our goodbyes for the first time in about a week and I headed on the final 13 miles for me to home. Haven't been out of each others sight since Tuesday evening and I miss her already.
You can see why can't you?
6 stops...
6 Cities/towns...
720 Miles...
It began on Tuesday:
I picked up my travelling companion for the next 6 or so days, Pinklet and we headed off for new horizons and old haunts, friends and family. Little did we know what high adventure was to await us...*
*(Disclaimer:The author asserts only that 'high adventure' is from his point of view and other perceptions may vary.
We headed up the M32, onto the M4, then M5 and the M6. We were making good time and it was pretty nice weather.
Oh god, we're lost already! Where are we? Oh wait, that's my house we've just gone past!
Then the weather changed - a little rain. More rain. A lot of rain. Fucking fuckloads of rain. Hail. Back to the rain. We were still making good time though.
Author's note - Although there are a number of people I dislike, (mostly celebrities and one ex,) there are only 3 people I actually hate: George W. Bush, John Prescott and for some reason the third one escapes me at present. Conversely there is only one inanimate object in the world that I hate - the M6. 3 lanes of motoring hell. For some excrutiating reason, everyone drives along at 70mph for a while and then at some random point, everyone will inexplicably lower their speed to approximately 30mph for a mile or two, then speed back up to 70mph for 5-8 miles and then another random point arrives and we go back to 30. Repeat for the entirety of your journey. AAAAAAaaaaaarrrrgh!
Then we all slowed to 30mph. I was not worried, (see above,) but then we slowed to 20... 10... 5... 0. Bugger. Turns out a lorry had overturned onto it's side, blocking two lanes between junction 17 and 18. Cleverly, the police had decided not to close junction 17, meaning loads of new cars still trying to join an already clogged road. I hope everyone involved in the incident was ok.
We get to Manchester and after a quick tussle with a magic junction on the M60, that was blocked and then flung us the wrong way down the M60 after a diversion and then appeared not to be blocked after all, (See? High adventure! As long as I don't tell you the real story, which is dull beyond all reason.) we finally arrived at Ortus's house, after a quick call for directions.
We love this man.
We watched Jurassic Park 2, which yielded up more stars than I previously thought, (see Ortus's blog for more details,) and I got rather drunk. We also decided to start a new SG group, The SG Pirate sock association:
Pop out and get yourself some. Go on, you know you want to. We'll wait.
Wednesday:
We met my friend Sam at the Trafford Centre, where I picked up A Scanner Darkly and True Romance for 3 each and decided not to buy GTA IV, as I'd not be able to play it for a week anyway. We had some great crepes and waffles and found drinks called Firefly:
Which pleased me greatly, as not only am I a huge Firefly fan, but I happened to be wearing my Firefly 'Browncoats' t-shirt. Yes, I am a massive geek, as has been pointed out to me during this trip no less than 5 times.
We went back to Sam's and met her new bunnies, (she has 6,) and her cat took to Pinks immediately, which was unheard of. We ate and played Wii. I ruled at Boxing, but Pinks kicked my ass at Cow racing. We played House of the Dead and generally had fun.
Thursday:
The second leg.
We headed to Hull, for our sins. We had lunch with my Aunt and Uncle and Grandma, which was very nice, with Pinks gaining many popularity points by talking about being a seamstress, (my Aunt and Grandma both do various types of embroidery,) and having "The most lovely smiley eyes," according to my Grandma. We looked at pictures and sculptures done by my Aunt, hats by my cousin and I managed to knock out a little bit of 'Moonlight Sonata' on the piano.
Then in the afternoon we headed over to my Mum's in Grimsby. Well, technically Cleethorpes, but who really gives a shit. She got to meet my Mum, ('She's Nuts!) my stepdad Mick, my stepsister and her husband and two kids, and the dog, Jake. I got to meet my stepsister's daughter, Kaitlin, for the first time (She's 3 & this is the first time I've seen her!) and entertain her son, Kyle by teaching him to skateboard. We ended the evening with a few drinks and my mum getting tipsy and telling Pinks most of our recent family history. Sorry love.
Friday
The Third leg.
We headed down to Ely.
Chocolate cornflake cake?
Where I got to meet Pink's mum and dad, her sister and her fiance and had a great curry and a few drinks before crashing out on the sofa. I decided they were lovely people and they, in turn, didn't physically eject me from the house.
Saturday
Got to meet Pink's Grandma, who was lovely and another embroiderer and the completer of some of the most fiendishly difficult jigsaws I've ever seen.
Later, we went into Ely and met up with Pink's sister and went through the market and got yummies for a picnic. We met more of Pink's friends there and I managed to burn my head in the sun. In the evening we went drinking in Ely with pink's friends from before. I had had plans to meet a friend of mine in Cambridge, but it was going to be impossible to get there and back to Ely and spend any real time there. Next time Al.
One guy. Four girls. A shitload of alcohol. Mayhem.
Sunday
Hungover. Sunburned. Not feeling the best. Have to get up to catch a train to London. Seriously? Yup. Shit.
We manage to get a train to Kings Cross, along with Pink's sister & her fiance. Once there, we hopped on a tube to Camden. I had a slight flashback to last time, when I almost got caught with an 8th of weed in my pocket, but this time I had nothing on me, so no worries. We went to the Edinburgh Castle, (I think?) and met Doplex, Munch, Iannnnnn Jackie and ex-member Firemonkey. Many drinks followed and we spotted Paul Kaye (Dennis Pennis,) a few tables across. I talked to Iannnnnn about swopping our fingers for the feet of various animals after Munch reminded us all of how Terry Nutkins had had his fingers bitten off by his pet otter and Jackie managed to activate a death ray or a sun lamp, (we're not sure which,) above our table. I ducked out for a while to have my ears stretched up to 4mm and went back to a slightly drunk Pinks. We continued drinking and talking crap for the most part until we had to leave for the train home and a great time was had by all. Good to meet you guys, you fucking rock.
Monday
The final leg:
We got up late and just got ready in time for Pink's other Grandparents to come over. We spent the morning chatting and had lunch before packing up and setting off back home. We made it in really good time - something like 3 and a half hours. Stopping at Pink's for tea, we said our goodbyes for the first time in about a week and I headed on the final 13 miles for me to home. Haven't been out of each others sight since Tuesday evening and I miss her already.
You can see why can't you?
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Oh, and here's my to do list for sometime in the near future:
-Buy some Pirate Socks.