narcissus

I don't know what I want in life anymore. I saw Lost in Translation yesterday. One thing I got out of it was that she was still capable of being happy, it was just her situation that was holding her back.

Work is killing me. The only thing in life my mother wants is for me to finish my program and have my profession. But work makes me feel like I am dead. I know that I've worked hard to get where I am, and that it would be terrible for me to quit now, I know this . But it's hard, I have no guidance and no one to bounce ideas off of. I don't know how to get out of this funk, suck it up, and get back to busting my ass. Maybe venting will make me feel better. It also doesn't help that boxing is the funnest and most exciting thing I have done in a long time! But it's good because it's teaching me discipline and giving me confidence in a different way. I think I am just bitter at school because it has made my focus too narrow, not like my undergraduate education...

Anyway, to something more exciting, I met this woman last month who is the shit! She's smart, fun, real pretty, and herself. We don't live near each other or anything, and I don't even know if she's into chicks. Hell, I didn't even really think I could be into chicks cuz really being into them is different than making out with your friend at a party cause it's her birthday and you're drunk and she's hot. The point of this ramble is that I'm envisioning sex in a different light. Or something like that. I don't know exactly how to xplain it, but I hope I find more people like that.

BACK TO BOXING TOMORROW!