I doubt any of my one and a half readers will care that my previous two blog entries were just reposts of my latest myspace blogs, but this one, due to its very nature, is SG exclusive!
I discovered about a year ago give or take that I'm a voyeur. I thought I was before that but never really invested energy into finding out before. About a year ago I put myself in certain situations, including a long talk with the at-the-time-girlfriend, to test the theory and find my true desires. I suppose a journey of sexual self-discovery is a part of every person's youth and I just went through the process a little later than normal... oh well.
So, I like to watch. What does this mean? On its most basic level it means just that, I like to watch people have sex, or even watch girls be naked (I assume everyone has this a little bit since we're members here and most men I know watch pornography). Beyond that, and the level which causes it to be the fetish voyeur and not simply the average voyeur, is that I preffer to watch people have sex in many cases (not all cases) than actually do the deed myself.
Now, don't get me wrong, I'm perfectly capable of a sexual and loving relationship. I enjoy sex very much. I just often would rather watch people have sex and indeed get off best when doing so, or when imagining this happening.
Where is this leading? Where is step two? Well, what I really want is a relationship where voyeurism could be a part of my sex life. The one way I know of to go about this, or at least the way most appealing to me, is to watch my girlfriend engage in sexual activity before I have sex with her. The easiest way to do this is to watch her masturbate or dance, but in reality I have decided I want more than that. I have decided the actual act of sex, casual sex even, is part of what makes the voyeurism enjoyable. For this reason I realize I need a girlfriend (and at my age in all likelyhood a future spouse) who is willing to fuck other men or women in front of me, only to have me join in after watching or fuck them after the other person is done and leaves.
I would never want to fuck anyone other than my girlfriend, which might make it easier to find someone willing. That said, women who would fuck other men than their boyfriend might be hard to come by. I have seen a lot of women on this site who make claims about being non-monogamous, but rarely if ever have I met one in real life, and the women I have talked about this with the past year or so were... not very receptive.
I finish graduate school in May and I think, at that point, my best course of action will be some kind of Internet ad, be it craigslist or whatever, which is something I have never done before. It feels a little awkward doing it that way, I've always been a strong backer of the "feel the moment" method of dating, but I can't think of a better way to meet a girl with the acceptance level I desire.
Wish me luck.
I discovered about a year ago give or take that I'm a voyeur. I thought I was before that but never really invested energy into finding out before. About a year ago I put myself in certain situations, including a long talk with the at-the-time-girlfriend, to test the theory and find my true desires. I suppose a journey of sexual self-discovery is a part of every person's youth and I just went through the process a little later than normal... oh well.
So, I like to watch. What does this mean? On its most basic level it means just that, I like to watch people have sex, or even watch girls be naked (I assume everyone has this a little bit since we're members here and most men I know watch pornography). Beyond that, and the level which causes it to be the fetish voyeur and not simply the average voyeur, is that I preffer to watch people have sex in many cases (not all cases) than actually do the deed myself.
Now, don't get me wrong, I'm perfectly capable of a sexual and loving relationship. I enjoy sex very much. I just often would rather watch people have sex and indeed get off best when doing so, or when imagining this happening.
Where is this leading? Where is step two? Well, what I really want is a relationship where voyeurism could be a part of my sex life. The one way I know of to go about this, or at least the way most appealing to me, is to watch my girlfriend engage in sexual activity before I have sex with her. The easiest way to do this is to watch her masturbate or dance, but in reality I have decided I want more than that. I have decided the actual act of sex, casual sex even, is part of what makes the voyeurism enjoyable. For this reason I realize I need a girlfriend (and at my age in all likelyhood a future spouse) who is willing to fuck other men or women in front of me, only to have me join in after watching or fuck them after the other person is done and leaves.
I would never want to fuck anyone other than my girlfriend, which might make it easier to find someone willing. That said, women who would fuck other men than their boyfriend might be hard to come by. I have seen a lot of women on this site who make claims about being non-monogamous, but rarely if ever have I met one in real life, and the women I have talked about this with the past year or so were... not very receptive.
I finish graduate school in May and I think, at that point, my best course of action will be some kind of Internet ad, be it craigslist or whatever, which is something I have never done before. It feels a little awkward doing it that way, I've always been a strong backer of the "feel the moment" method of dating, but I can't think of a better way to meet a girl with the acceptance level I desire.
Wish me luck.
i dont think finding girls that are non-monogamous is gonna be the trick. I think the REAL trick is gonna be finding girls that are open to having varying sexual partners, but still have you be the priority. Kind of a two-tiered sexual relationship.
I am confident, however, that its out there. Best o' luck to ya.
There were moments when only dogs could hear me.