I have realised how alot (if not everything) i have tried to change in my life was nothing but a complete waste of time. It keeps staying the way it is or getting worst every time i try to make something about it. When i was in highschool getting bullied - i tried getting help but it only led to me being in more pain and trouble.
when i try to make a move and get close to a woman - i always end up getting used , abused , lied to and all that shizzaz.
when i try to put a smile on my face and think on the bright side , something comes along to ruin it all or my mind ends up going over my past to make me feel like complete shit. Its a waste of time.
im just the shadow of the man i used to be , if you can even call that a "man" lol i dont even know what im doing here , wasting my time writting this stupid post. Maybe a mix of anger , sadness and obvious emotional instability mixed together to let some steam out. All i know is that im tired. i want it to go away