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mykel

the cupboard under the stairs

Member Since 2004

Followers 16 Following 42

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Friday Oct 07, 2005

Oct 7, 2005
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This modern love.breaks me.
this modern love.wastes me.
(Bloc Party)


I want hand-holding and kissing.
I want saying whatevers on my mind without worrying about freaking anyone out.
I want waking up in the sunlight and soft afternoons and tea and make-outing.
I want picture-taking and dresses and dancing.
For the first time, I feel like everything will be ok. Not now, but soon.
It started when I got my lip pierced, like that was some kind of everything will be ok pressure point. And I will have meds soon, which means I can feel like a normal person and I can work and get myself out of debt and out of Virginia.
And if the only girl crush Ive had who didnt completely ignore me is moving out of the country, thats ok. Ill be happier knowing shes happier.
And Tyler and I will have a Will and Grace or a Weetzie and Dirk kind of relationship. Only Ill be the gay one and hell be the girl. I think we dont belong in a romantic relationship, but I think we needed to be in order to develop the strong bond that will last forever and see us through the hard times. I think were soul mates. I believe in that kind of thing.
Im a greedy bitch, but I deserve all these things. My life has sucked too hard and too long. (Hard and long, haha.) Hopefully there wont be too much more due-paying.
When I got my terrible haircut a few weeks ago, Tyler was waiting and he had a kind of dream or vision or something. He said it was the future and I was calling him on his cell. We had broken up, and I lived with my girlfriend, and we apparently lived far apart. I called him saying that I missed him and our daughter missed him, and I wanted him to move closer. I want that, without the him living far away part. I wish I knew where I was living, because I dont know that part or how to get it.
Itll work itself out, I think.

Holy crap that was long.
Also, you guys all win 10 points for making me smile yesterday. kiss
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
drstinkypants:
where you gonna go if you get out of VA?
Oct 8, 2005
eddie:
Hmm, Virginia.... I forget where that is... but if it is close to Toronto we should most definitely go on some fun little trip. But, I am poor, and Virginia is probably not close.
Oct 9, 2005

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