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musim

Broken Arrow

Member Since 2006

Followers 7 Following 22

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Wednesday May 09, 2007

May 9, 2007
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Well I haven't posted on here in a loooooooooooooooooooooooong time. School's out and I made it through relatively unscathed. I've got an awesome internship now and I just need to make sure I work my butt off to keep it that way.

Tomorrow Axis (my band) has a gig at the Eagle (I've been posting this everywhere) so come and hang out if you can. Its going to be fun. We'll play stuff we haven't played live in a while.

I'm starting to get used to my daytime schedule which is good.

I really don't have much in the way of thought to speak of. I started reading a book called "The Greatest Secret in the World" by Og Mandino. Its a brainwashing self help book that I like. It has what it calls "10 scrolls" that you're supposed to read 3 times a day (1 scroll a month). I've read it off and on throughout the years. It really helps me enjoy life and conquer my fears more. I've never actually made it through the whole thing though. But let's face it, I'm a pretty negative person. This book makes me more positive but at the same time its like adding +10 to -1717913649813648916. But either way, every little bit helps.

I keep randomly watching these romance comedies and if I had a weaker mind I'd start thinking something is wrong with me. The main characters need someone else in their lives so much and they become so dependent so quickly on who they date. I really don't sit around thinking about how much it sucks I'm single and not getting laid, mainly because it really doesn't suck. Most of the people I've dated over the last couple years have either been so overly dependent and insecure I couldn't deal with them in that capacity or they've been completely unwilling to open up to me. I can only do so much in the way of conversation.

Its like the world lets their insecurities rule them. I know I'm no role model, hell I'm most of the way to batshit crazy, but still. My insecurities are real world things like school and my job. Things I can do something about.

You know what now I'm starting to think about how much a lot of my manwhore friends piss me off. This one in particular. I get along with him pretty well but he's such a jerk to the girls he dates and they fall for it because they're this insecure depedent mess. In a way I'm jealous because some of them are hot but in another way I'm completely disgusted. Especially since he goes for them and then wonders why they're acting crazy when he doesn't date them after making out/sleeping with them. I know that girls use guys in the same way and that also leads me to believe that girls are just as insecure with their feelings as guys and sometimes jump overboard at first.

Seems like I was going for something and I can't really think of it now.

I think I'm going to cover a Pixies song. Maybe I'll start on that now. I always wanted to try out singing. Well I suppose I have before but church choir was like 4th grade (I have a trophy to prove it). By the way you guys have to tell me if I suck at it! And if you think you'll feel bad saying it then know that I've already been gifted with enough musical talent. See there? Its easier to insult someone if they express an ego even if its contrived. So keep that anger and we'll talk later.

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