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muse

SG Since 2005

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Friday Apr 20, 2007

Apr 20, 2007
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"Ive seen the storyline played out so many times before"

(yet another favorite of mine)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This morning I had the strangest, most vivid dream that covered so many aspects of my current life. Overall it left me feeling slightly uncomfortable. It made me realize just how uncertain I really feel about my new waitressing job. While the job itself isn't bad, I'm starting to doubt that I can live off of what I can pull in there. Last night I only made around $30 in tips and these constant bad nights are really dragging my spirit down. Even worse is that so many of my coworkers don't do the work they're supposed to do before they leave so that leaves a lot of extra stuff that I need to do before I can go home. No one seems to really care about anyone else there and I'm not used to working around so many selfish people. Now if I were pulling in good money, I wouldn't care, but it just seems like I'm wasting my time. I think I'd be better off shaking my ass in dirty old men's faces.

bah......I'm just so frustrated in general.

I've been talking a lot with a close friend about the constant struggle to find that elusive shred of happiness.We both have different ideas on how to find it, but I figured I could try his approach for a while, which is to go out and try new things. We were going to go camping this weekend but both of our work schedules conflicted with that idea.....but now I'm determined to go out and try something new for a change.....something adventurous.

Ah well. We'll see how that goes.
VIEW 8 of 8 COMMENTS
fiacha:
The elusive shred of happiness is elusive for a reason. Personally I've found the reason to be because if I'm actively searching for it, it's going to do it's best to avoid me. But when I take things as they come and just live, it finds me of its own free will.

And adventures are good. Good for the body, good for the soul. Especially camping adventures. Some of the best stories I have (and have heard told) begin with camping.

How about coming up to spin fire? smile
Apr 21, 2007
knack:
Read Awareness by Anthony De Mello, STUPID.
Apr 26, 2007

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