murry

I havent been on in a while dont have internet access in the little trailer we are living in while we build our house honestly I dont really miss it with all I have to do however I definitely missed this site. Fall has hit & is gloriously full blown in vibrant array of reds, oranges and golden yellow I do not honestly remember any other fall being quite so spectacular in its range of colors however it has also been a rainy sloppy mess. I awake every morning to the sound of rain hitting aluminum and i am amazed that i find this to be the most beautiful i have ever heard the rain sound who'd of thunk this crappy little trailer would give me such a gift. I unlike most people I know love the rain I think its refreshing and cleansing so what if it is also melancholy that is part of its charm all I want to do is curl up with a book and a good cup of coffee, half the time I dont even read the book I stare out the window for hours lost in the rain the clouds and my own thoughts. I do suppose that I am a little melancholy myself today my significant other and I have been fighting for about two weeks now and last night he told me to leave just shut up and leave, he didn't care for my attitude.The thing is that if I would have said the too him he would have come unglued and started hitting things, of course I didn't leave since I was completely trashed however this morning I am really wondering if I should just move out, move on it would be so easy the hard part is always staying and working things out...do I want to work it out? That is the real question or I am just going with the flow settling because I'm 28 and worried I'm not going to do any better....could be true....or am I just being lazy walking away with out fighting for what I want. Hmmmmmm