ARGH!!! TURMOIL!!! 
so things are steadily getting worse with relationships within the band.
lemme paint you a picture...
over the many many many years i've been in situations like this before. People that have fucked me over, i've given second and third chances, and then dropped them like a stone. I learnt from that and whenever it happened again, i would just walk away. if people i considered friends made me truly miserable, its not worth having them around.
in recent years i've kinda gone back on this, which has in some cases been good, and some cases bad. but, y'know, you learn from it, and move on.
I do know one thing...over the past couple years i've had fallings outs and problems with friends, but they've been sorted out, cos we've been adult enough to talk about the problems...but now i'm beginning to think thats probably just that both parties actually still wanna be friends and wanna work out everything.
so things with me and sarah (our drummer) are getting worse.
after our screaming match the other night - which was instigated by me wanting to TALK to her about the very minor issues that we've had - i've kinda backed off from her. After some of the things she said to me (which were really HORRENDOUS), i'm not prepared to back down or let her get away with it, but at the same time, theres no need for unpleasentness.
as it happens, we had rehearsal and a gig this week. and shes carrying on like nothings happened, expecting me to do the same. which is pretty difficult considering what she said.
last night we had another row - because she ASSUMED i was giving her a lift home from the show, when i'd never suggested it in the first place. I explained i was going home early cos i was knackered, that i'm not even going via her place (which is a bit out of the way), and that i'd take her stuff home for her.
i got "WHAT-EVERED" after she threw a strop.
in hindsight, i wish i'd got her gear back out of my car and threw it at her. "Get that home from New Cross, you little shit".
some other things:
- she doesn't want to rehearse anymore
- she doesn't want to write new songs anymore
- any suggestions from me about what I think the band should be doing is ignored. its like its never been mentioned
- i overheard her last night saying how excited she was to start "our new bad" with another guy who is to be her drummer.
now, this is the perfect situation where we should be talking to each other to work shit out and see if we can salvage what good work we've done this year. but i'm fooling myself, as it'll just descend into another row.
my question is - how the fuck do you try to talk to someone about problems, when you know they'll immediately start a row and go on the defensive cos they are so fucking insecure?
i'm not a happy chappy right now...and at the moment, i'm about 50% a Small Mercy...
s'laters!
ps for anyone coming to our next gigs, due to holidays and shit, i think its safe to say we'll definately still be playing Portsmouth Fawcett Inn on 8th August. I'll keep you posted on any other changes.
so things are steadily getting worse with relationships within the band.
lemme paint you a picture...
over the many many many years i've been in situations like this before. People that have fucked me over, i've given second and third chances, and then dropped them like a stone. I learnt from that and whenever it happened again, i would just walk away. if people i considered friends made me truly miserable, its not worth having them around.
in recent years i've kinda gone back on this, which has in some cases been good, and some cases bad. but, y'know, you learn from it, and move on.
I do know one thing...over the past couple years i've had fallings outs and problems with friends, but they've been sorted out, cos we've been adult enough to talk about the problems...but now i'm beginning to think thats probably just that both parties actually still wanna be friends and wanna work out everything.
so things with me and sarah (our drummer) are getting worse.
after our screaming match the other night - which was instigated by me wanting to TALK to her about the very minor issues that we've had - i've kinda backed off from her. After some of the things she said to me (which were really HORRENDOUS), i'm not prepared to back down or let her get away with it, but at the same time, theres no need for unpleasentness.
as it happens, we had rehearsal and a gig this week. and shes carrying on like nothings happened, expecting me to do the same. which is pretty difficult considering what she said.
last night we had another row - because she ASSUMED i was giving her a lift home from the show, when i'd never suggested it in the first place. I explained i was going home early cos i was knackered, that i'm not even going via her place (which is a bit out of the way), and that i'd take her stuff home for her.
i got "WHAT-EVERED" after she threw a strop.
in hindsight, i wish i'd got her gear back out of my car and threw it at her. "Get that home from New Cross, you little shit".
some other things:
- she doesn't want to rehearse anymore
- she doesn't want to write new songs anymore
- any suggestions from me about what I think the band should be doing is ignored. its like its never been mentioned
- i overheard her last night saying how excited she was to start "our new bad" with another guy who is to be her drummer.
now, this is the perfect situation where we should be talking to each other to work shit out and see if we can salvage what good work we've done this year. but i'm fooling myself, as it'll just descend into another row.
my question is - how the fuck do you try to talk to someone about problems, when you know they'll immediately start a row and go on the defensive cos they are so fucking insecure?
i'm not a happy chappy right now...and at the moment, i'm about 50% a Small Mercy...
s'laters!
ps for anyone coming to our next gigs, due to holidays and shit, i think its safe to say we'll definately still be playing Portsmouth Fawcett Inn on 8th August. I'll keep you posted on any other changes.
VIEW 24 of 24 COMMENTS
yeah i'll be awaiting my loyalty card