Saturday Oct 15, 2005

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Tonight I will put on my temporary alter ego and become the Halloween Phantom Delivery Girl of my neighborhood. I found this little poem:

The Phantom haunts you happily
From now through Halloween
And was delivered by a friend
Who (hopefully) was not seen.

The spirit of the neighborhood
Has come to wish you well.
Someone, somewhere, selected you
To receive this happy spell.

You must display the Phantom
On your door so all can spy
That you're already haunted
By this happy little guy.

Then fix 3 sacks with goodies
Like the one given to you.
Ring someone's bell and leave a bag
And make them happy, too!


Yes, I know. It's kind of goofy, a little silly...well, whatever. It doesn't take much to make me happy, and I like the thought of making other people's day brighter smile So I've made little Phantom cutouts with the poem printed on him, and I've put together some gift bags of fun little halloween stuff--candle holder, kitchen towel, toys for the kids--and I'm going to sneak around and leave them on peoples' porches later.

hehehehe smile

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

20 minutes later...and I'm suddenly really not so happy. I'll pop my rant in a spoiler so as not to inadvertantly bring anyone down.

SPOILERS! (Click to view)
I finally got to a point where I felt I could write to that friend I got into the fight with a few weeks ago...everyone kept telling me, "Oh, she's not mad anymore. Her pride won't let her be the one to approach you first." But everything I tried to write sounded so angry, full of pointing fingers and blame and "you're wrong, and here's the proof." I finally wrote a very generic, "hey, I'm sorry I made you mad" mail, but I didn't apologize for what I said or why I said it, just that I was sorry that it upset her and made her mad. Because I'm *not* sorry. I didn't do anything wrong. It's not my fault she took what I said the wrong way and then didn't discuss it with me--and yes, I disappeared after the email where she absolutely blasted me, because I was really hurt that the first thing she thought was that I'd deliberately set out to hurt her somehow, and she's not mad at the other people who were involved in the same conversation.

Because...I'm still mad, I guess. I thought I was over it. And I miss her.

She answered this morning. Basically said she was replying so that I knew she got my mail, but that in an effort to be civil she wasn't really going to say anything. I got the impression she felt my mail was not adequate, gee. Oh, and she said that she'll "see" me "around sometime."

You know, I don't need to deal with her issues--too much pride and the inability to forgive people for being less than perfect.

I have plenty of my own issues--feeling guilty for every damn thing in the world, a little too much stubbornness for my own good. There's too much hurt in the world already. I don't need any more added.

Sorry for the rant.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'm watching Grease right now. Is it just me, or was Frankie Avalon...really hot??

VIEW 14 of 14 COMMENTS
paintedbat:
hahahaha I would have been away longer, but someone bought me a membership. biggrin
goblintcat:
Heck, I'm not going anywhere. I've got a position to defend in that there harem and I'm not giving it up without a fight! wink

I've got big fuzzy black panther slippers (the animal not the activist group wink ) But by the sounds of things you've got a whole bunch of cool slippers. That's what makes cooler weather interesting. Footwear that can potentially scare cats! smile

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