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mrschainsaw

Canada

Member Since 2002

Followers 113 Following 116

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Saturday Apr 24, 2004

Apr 24, 2004
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It feels like everything I'm working towards is in vain. I'm sick of "paying dues" only to face more uncertainty.

I have an idea of what I want, but it seems so far away that I don't even know what the point is.

I don't want to rush things and fuck it up, but how much longer can I wait?

Maybe the grass isn't greener, but right now it would feel really nice to work as hard as I have, and get something immediate in return. I hate that I think that because I know that I've been conditioned to think like that by our profit-driven society, but sometimes immediate gratification is all that counts.

I worked really hard this term, and I got the grades I deserve, but the novelty has already worn off. I have one more year of this. The ironic part is that I would stay in school forever to avoid looking for a job. Why else would I go during the summer?

There's my confession - I remain static so that nothing changes, even though change is the one thing I really want.
xo
stellar
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
antonowitch:
Dont feel so static!

Why dont you travel around the world to see different and new things. Maybe you get an idea what you want...

Greetz,

antonowitch
Apr 25, 2004
estrada:
I've felt as if I'm in a stop motion feature that someone forgot to finish.
Apr 28, 2004

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