Dear Santa
I know it is quite early for me to write to you being March n' all but it is cold and snowy and wintery outside so it is kinda like Christmas.
I also know I have been a bad boy and when I die I shall go straight to hell; Do Not Pass Go, Do Not Collect 200 but I am hoping you will grant just one, little, itsy-bitsy teeny-weeny early Christmas giftie for me.
I need a helper monkey. It's not a want, it's a need. I have no way of fending for myself with out one. If there is a deluxe model which can clean up after me and do the washing up and ironing then all the better but if you can only get hold of the Cook Only model then that would be fine. Anything, really, as long as it is house trained and doesn't have fleas.
Thank you Mr Claus. I have left a Cadbury's egg out for you and Rudolph to enjoy.
Yours sincerely
MRO
aged 32 and three quarters
p.s. sorry about eating the egg but there is no food in the house and I am hungry
I know it is quite early for me to write to you being March n' all but it is cold and snowy and wintery outside so it is kinda like Christmas.
I also know I have been a bad boy and when I die I shall go straight to hell; Do Not Pass Go, Do Not Collect 200 but I am hoping you will grant just one, little, itsy-bitsy teeny-weeny early Christmas giftie for me.
I need a helper monkey. It's not a want, it's a need. I have no way of fending for myself with out one. If there is a deluxe model which can clean up after me and do the washing up and ironing then all the better but if you can only get hold of the Cook Only model then that would be fine. Anything, really, as long as it is house trained and doesn't have fleas.
Thank you Mr Claus. I have left a Cadbury's egg out for you and Rudolph to enjoy.
Yours sincerely
MRO
aged 32 and three quarters
p.s. sorry about eating the egg but there is no food in the house and I am hungry
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also, i believe i heard him mutter, as he walked away, that you were being a bit picky with the 'no fleas' thing and thinks you should probably revise your request. being rather fond of my fleas, i agree, but it was his idea first so dont get mad at me.