I hate this pic I put up here...it doesn't look right. It is stretched out too much..still need to try and fix that again.
Abandoned Dream.
Feels like my time is never to be
Life is listless and fading away
Feels like I am lost in a tear duct of heaven.
Never to be touched by you.
Those days will never be of living and discovering
Made from moments of love, only to be lost
Secret moments hidden away in mind
Not even born still life, never given that chance
I will still love you unconditionally
You decided that you need me not
As you lay there sleeping, feeling blue.
I will be there with you
I had the most astounding blue eyes youd seen
I would have melted your heart
While I lay there craving your touch
Say that you would have loved me too,
Brought me up in the right way.
Taught me the little things,
Kissed my boo-boos away
Hugged me, saying it would be alright
I will be there with you forever
Feels like you did not want me
Of lifelines faded away
Dreams, pale in comparison when abandoned
Soft-spoken syllables for you
I will be with you, I will love you
Never stop thinking of me
Near or far, here or there, we will be together forever.
I lived in you for so little time
never to feel or sense anything
that was the last beat of my heart,
abandoned child forever
When the world
When the world is floating free,
There is too much to consume.
You will always lose over time,
Do not hide behind false pride.
When the world takes a dive,
All we can hope for is life.
The beauty of it all is hidden,
In puddles, buttercups and such.
When the world is in love,
It is all we ever wished for.
The extravagance of it all,
Its not lost upon the stars.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
There must be a reason
That jsut could have been
The lives were separated
by more than miles
Take that smile off of your face
the deception led to a poor sleep
carried pennies at my door
It happened so long ago
I close my eyes
I dug in deep
I slashed my arms through
The blood ran free
I ran myself through
I bet boxcutters were not for this
take that look off your face
You didn't know how I needed
that forever night
You will know, until the bad news
is carried to your door
---------------------------------------------------
No more talk of bad things
Forgive all these sins
nothing left to harm
let us embrace in freedom
let my shoulder dry your tears
Say you want some peace
not to fight every moment
say you will see me again
promise me memories not lost
I am my ownshelter
I need nothing
all i want is freedom
No longer living in night
Someone to hold and hug me
saying share our lives
anywhere is fine with me
let us not live in obsidian seconds
say the word, glance each other's way
tell ourselves of the truths
laughters in love,
all I ask of you, is one day of tranquilty
and all I grant is your freedom.
--------------------------------------------------
I laid down on my knees
prayed up to the sky
No more days like these,
and I will not ask why.
The greatest grandest city
Well, there is not another city like her
there is nothing else like
the magical city called New Orleans
(to be continued.......)
Okay, so a new fact about me....what to tell today? I hate my birthday, I used to runaway and hide on my birthday. My mother tells me that I was always like that. I hated attention. Perhaps that is why I don't strive to be higher on my food chain. The weird thing is...I was in theater. Now? I don't know....but I have been called "The Tin Man"by more than one person, including my mother...apparently when I choose to be, I close off my emotions...and become more quiet and reserved. I used to revel in this name and fact, now not so much...but I am an ass...well at least I think I am...other people in my real life here tell me I am a good person, I don't see it...I really don't. I think I am more naive than anything else. That is probably my worst trait.
Well I think this is the last journal entry until Sunday. When hopefully I can continue and finish the new orleans poem. I would like to actually polish that and put one of my better poems on here. I can write better than what I show...I just don't bother usually, sorry. That is my fault for holding back nad being that tin man again. At some point, I guess we all have to open up and start to blossom for ourselves.
D.
Abandoned Dream.
Feels like my time is never to be
Life is listless and fading away
Feels like I am lost in a tear duct of heaven.
Never to be touched by you.
Those days will never be of living and discovering
Made from moments of love, only to be lost
Secret moments hidden away in mind
Not even born still life, never given that chance
I will still love you unconditionally
You decided that you need me not
As you lay there sleeping, feeling blue.
I will be there with you
I had the most astounding blue eyes youd seen
I would have melted your heart
While I lay there craving your touch
Say that you would have loved me too,
Brought me up in the right way.
Taught me the little things,
Kissed my boo-boos away
Hugged me, saying it would be alright
I will be there with you forever
Feels like you did not want me
Of lifelines faded away
Dreams, pale in comparison when abandoned
Soft-spoken syllables for you
I will be with you, I will love you
Never stop thinking of me
Near or far, here or there, we will be together forever.
I lived in you for so little time
never to feel or sense anything
that was the last beat of my heart,
abandoned child forever
When the world
When the world is floating free,
There is too much to consume.
You will always lose over time,
Do not hide behind false pride.
When the world takes a dive,
All we can hope for is life.
The beauty of it all is hidden,
In puddles, buttercups and such.
When the world is in love,
It is all we ever wished for.
The extravagance of it all,
Its not lost upon the stars.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
There must be a reason
That jsut could have been
The lives were separated
by more than miles
Take that smile off of your face
the deception led to a poor sleep
carried pennies at my door
It happened so long ago
I close my eyes
I dug in deep
I slashed my arms through
The blood ran free
I ran myself through
I bet boxcutters were not for this
take that look off your face
You didn't know how I needed
that forever night
You will know, until the bad news
is carried to your door
---------------------------------------------------
No more talk of bad things
Forgive all these sins
nothing left to harm
let us embrace in freedom
let my shoulder dry your tears
Say you want some peace
not to fight every moment
say you will see me again
promise me memories not lost
I am my ownshelter
I need nothing
all i want is freedom
No longer living in night
Someone to hold and hug me
saying share our lives
anywhere is fine with me
let us not live in obsidian seconds
say the word, glance each other's way
tell ourselves of the truths
laughters in love,
all I ask of you, is one day of tranquilty
and all I grant is your freedom.
--------------------------------------------------
I laid down on my knees
prayed up to the sky
No more days like these,
and I will not ask why.
The greatest grandest city
Well, there is not another city like her
there is nothing else like
the magical city called New Orleans
(to be continued.......)
Okay, so a new fact about me....what to tell today? I hate my birthday, I used to runaway and hide on my birthday. My mother tells me that I was always like that. I hated attention. Perhaps that is why I don't strive to be higher on my food chain. The weird thing is...I was in theater. Now? I don't know....but I have been called "The Tin Man"by more than one person, including my mother...apparently when I choose to be, I close off my emotions...and become more quiet and reserved. I used to revel in this name and fact, now not so much...but I am an ass...well at least I think I am...other people in my real life here tell me I am a good person, I don't see it...I really don't. I think I am more naive than anything else. That is probably my worst trait.
Well I think this is the last journal entry until Sunday. When hopefully I can continue and finish the new orleans poem. I would like to actually polish that and put one of my better poems on here. I can write better than what I show...I just don't bother usually, sorry. That is my fault for holding back nad being that tin man again. At some point, I guess we all have to open up and start to blossom for ourselves.
D.
VIEW 11 of 11 COMMENTS
Jen is really a blow up doll. No, but she was (snicker) a cheerleader, (giggle) for the Blue Bombers ages ago. She still maintains a great figure, but she's a big philosophy/hippy attitude kind of a girl now. You should come. I know socials can be cheesie. Mine, hopefully won't be terribly cheesie. We were contemplating having pudding wrestling (seriously), but realized that we'd have wavers to get signed, a liscence, it was too much of a pain in the ass. Suicide sent us a beater and a pair of boy cut panties for the social! I'm very psyched about them!
Now that I've written a novel. Ciao! And tell me how the hell you are doing!
Lo