mr_zero

Ok so this is going to crack you up if you ever had a parent type catch you totally plastered or with a major hangover.

I was getting up to have a coffee before I cracked open my first weekend beer. My dad was standing there and asks me if I heard my mom come in the house. She had gone to a work xmas party. I didn't expect her home for another hour and told him so. He says to me that her car is out back. I look outside and sure enough there it sat.

I got some shoes on and opened the door to go check it out. There lying on the back porch is my mom. Next to her is a puddle of vomit. It took me .00005 seconds to figure it out. I started cracking up. I stood there laughing and I heard her say 'Fuck you.' I said, 'Have a bit to drink mom?' Again with the fuck you. I excailmed 'That's gross!' She tells me that it is just puke from drinking. I explain no the whole fuck you thing is just wrong. I get another fuck you out of her. I was laughing the whole time.

Now here I sit. I never got the beer because it took me about a half hour to get her in the house and I am babysitting a drunk. It would piss me off if it wasn't so damn funny.