her ; i am leaving you,
btw i love you and thank you.
what the fuck kind of shit is that. all i know is that i feel so many emotions, betrayal, failure, more emotional saddness then i have ever felt. i know i will overcome it, i always do. i just wonder what the permenant damage or baggage will be. i am not what i was told i was. i am not who i was told i would be.
i have listened to fiona apple again to help me through this. i know that i am not able to be with anyone. i am not relationship material. i will admit my defeat and become one of the emotionless, faceless masses. i have become what i feared, a lemming. i dont understand anything.
Song for the recently departed:
Fiona Apple Paper Bag:
I was staring at the sky, just looking for a star
To pray on, or wish on, or something like that
I was having a sweet fix of a daydream of a boy
Whose reality I knew, was a hopeless to be had
But then the dove of hope began its downward slope
And I believed for a moment that my chances
Were approaching to be grabbed
But as it came down near, so did a weary tear
-I thought it was a bird, but it was just a paper bag
-Hunger hurts, and I want him so bad, oh it kills
Cuz I know I?m a mess he don?t wanna clean up
I got to fold cuz these hands are too shaky to hold
-Hunger hurts, but starving works, when it costs too much to love
And I went crazy again today, looking for a strand to climb
Looking for a little hope
Baby said he couldn?t stay, wouldn?t put his lips to mine,
And a fail to kiss is a fail to cope
I said, ?Honey, I don?t feel so good, don?t feel justified
Come on put a little love here in my void,? - he said
?It?s all in your head,? and I said, ?So?s everything? -
But he didn?t get it - I thought he was a man
But he was just a little boy
-Hunger hurts, and I want him so bad, oh it kills
Cuz I know I?m a mess he don?t wanna clean up
I got to fold cuz these hands are too shaky to hold
-Hunger hurts, but starving works, when it costs too much to love
-Hunger hurts, and I want him so bad, oh it kills
Cuz I know I?m a mess he don?t wanna clean up
I got to fold cuz these hands are too shaky to hold
-Hunger hurts, but starving works, when it costs too much to love
btw i love you and thank you.
what the fuck kind of shit is that. all i know is that i feel so many emotions, betrayal, failure, more emotional saddness then i have ever felt. i know i will overcome it, i always do. i just wonder what the permenant damage or baggage will be. i am not what i was told i was. i am not who i was told i would be.
i have listened to fiona apple again to help me through this. i know that i am not able to be with anyone. i am not relationship material. i will admit my defeat and become one of the emotionless, faceless masses. i have become what i feared, a lemming. i dont understand anything.
Song for the recently departed:
Fiona Apple Paper Bag:
I was staring at the sky, just looking for a star
To pray on, or wish on, or something like that
I was having a sweet fix of a daydream of a boy
Whose reality I knew, was a hopeless to be had
But then the dove of hope began its downward slope
And I believed for a moment that my chances
Were approaching to be grabbed
But as it came down near, so did a weary tear
-I thought it was a bird, but it was just a paper bag
-Hunger hurts, and I want him so bad, oh it kills
Cuz I know I?m a mess he don?t wanna clean up
I got to fold cuz these hands are too shaky to hold
-Hunger hurts, but starving works, when it costs too much to love
And I went crazy again today, looking for a strand to climb
Looking for a little hope
Baby said he couldn?t stay, wouldn?t put his lips to mine,
And a fail to kiss is a fail to cope
I said, ?Honey, I don?t feel so good, don?t feel justified
Come on put a little love here in my void,? - he said
?It?s all in your head,? and I said, ?So?s everything? -
But he didn?t get it - I thought he was a man
But he was just a little boy
-Hunger hurts, and I want him so bad, oh it kills
Cuz I know I?m a mess he don?t wanna clean up
I got to fold cuz these hands are too shaky to hold
-Hunger hurts, but starving works, when it costs too much to love
-Hunger hurts, and I want him so bad, oh it kills
Cuz I know I?m a mess he don?t wanna clean up
I got to fold cuz these hands are too shaky to hold
-Hunger hurts, but starving works, when it costs too much to love
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
as for everyday being a humble experience I was implying that everyday I am faced with a situation that makes me look at myself in the mirror. Whether it's passing a homeless person and completely ignoring them or being short with someone for no reason. My daily fuck-ups humble me and make me realize how far away I am from becoming the individual I desire to be.