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A quick update for the day..
My mom is in the hospital, and staying over night. When I got home from work, she was lying on the couch with her hand over her mouth. She had a few chest pains throughout the morning, but overall, she was losing feeling in her left arm. My father and I ended up taking her to the emergency room, my father already doped up on drugs from his surgery friday.. She's all checked in, and not happy at all that A) she's in the hospital, and B) even angrier that she has to stay overnight. She's been very quiet and delusional today, mumbling random things and had me do two illegal u-turns before she made up her mind what she wanted, before saying 'just do what you want'. She's doing fine, they're running tests, bloodwork, whatever, but like I said, they want to keep her overnight..
I slept terribly last night. I napped from about 10 til about 12, got up, chatted until about 3:30, by then I felt really sad (for a certain reason I have yet to mention), went to bed and tossed and turned for over an hour. I woke myself up at 5:39 from the first two horrible nightmares..got back onto the computer for a few minutes.. Went back to bed, glad as hell that it was starting to get light out. I tossed and turned myself until I fell asleep again, and it seemed like just a minute later, I woke up from a third nightmare, thanks to my alarm.
Besides the tossing and turning, I slept so lightly that everything in my head was registering, and I was more or less actually thinking thoughts (which is why I was able to wake myself up when it was necessary). I could feel the emotions I felt from my dream, and everytime I woke up, my heart was beating and I felt panicked by things that were not real nor happening. The third one, I even started to believe the physical harm was happening, and woke up thinking my left wrist really had the slits in them. And no, it wasn't a suicide, someone else did it.
So, in my 4.5 hour morning, I got very few hours of sleeping done, which didn't do much anyway, and the rest of that time was spent being completely restless or uncomfortable.
That was before the issue with my mother started.
I'm glad I woke up periodically during the night, because I could come on here and make my responses to comments and emails and chat with people at the odd hours. I'm just so exhausted right now, and worried, and scared, and the stress level is increasing. I'm too afraid to go try and sleep. I still feel like the dreams were real.
A quick update for the day..
My mom is in the hospital, and staying over night. When I got home from work, she was lying on the couch with her hand over her mouth. She had a few chest pains throughout the morning, but overall, she was losing feeling in her left arm. My father and I ended up taking her to the emergency room, my father already doped up on drugs from his surgery friday.. She's all checked in, and not happy at all that A) she's in the hospital, and B) even angrier that she has to stay overnight. She's been very quiet and delusional today, mumbling random things and had me do two illegal u-turns before she made up her mind what she wanted, before saying 'just do what you want'. She's doing fine, they're running tests, bloodwork, whatever, but like I said, they want to keep her overnight..
I slept terribly last night. I napped from about 10 til about 12, got up, chatted until about 3:30, by then I felt really sad (for a certain reason I have yet to mention), went to bed and tossed and turned for over an hour. I woke myself up at 5:39 from the first two horrible nightmares..got back onto the computer for a few minutes.. Went back to bed, glad as hell that it was starting to get light out. I tossed and turned myself until I fell asleep again, and it seemed like just a minute later, I woke up from a third nightmare, thanks to my alarm.
Besides the tossing and turning, I slept so lightly that everything in my head was registering, and I was more or less actually thinking thoughts (which is why I was able to wake myself up when it was necessary). I could feel the emotions I felt from my dream, and everytime I woke up, my heart was beating and I felt panicked by things that were not real nor happening. The third one, I even started to believe the physical harm was happening, and woke up thinking my left wrist really had the slits in them. And no, it wasn't a suicide, someone else did it.
So, in my 4.5 hour morning, I got very few hours of sleeping done, which didn't do much anyway, and the rest of that time was spent being completely restless or uncomfortable.
That was before the issue with my mother started.
I'm glad I woke up periodically during the night, because I could come on here and make my responses to comments and emails and chat with people at the odd hours. I'm just so exhausted right now, and worried, and scared, and the stress level is increasing. I'm too afraid to go try and sleep. I still feel like the dreams were real.
VIEW 14 of 14 COMMENTS
The grass pass lets you sit behind the seats at the main stage and lets you see the second stage, which no one sits for anyway because it's usually put in a really shitty spot, like a back parking lot, or like it was when I went last year a gravel covered parking lot behind the vendors booths.
Well, that's the short and skinny of it.
Is Iron Maiden going to be at the one you're going to? They're not going to be in Nashville which...just...fucking...kills...me! Then again, at least I got to see Judas Preist last year. Are you going for any one band in particular?
-Josh
I hope things turn out alright, my Mom has been in and out of hospitals for years. It can be very stress ful...
Till the Pattern Weaves
Live Excellent and be Well
Babalyon