Y'know, I like to argue. I also find it satisfying to discuss--to debate in order to clarify and divide fact from fiction and opinion. But I like to argue. There's a flow to arguments, a pattern, in the same way that a fight has a pattern. It's fascinating to me that you can 'win' an argument through technique rather than logic or correctness of premise. You can use words to tangle up and undo the point your opponent is trying to make--you probably won't convince him, because he retains his internal idea of what his point is, but you can prevent him from convincing anyone else through verbal actions that map pretty closely to ripostes, thrusts, blocks, sweeps, and so on. It's a fight, and like any fight, it's only really interesting if it's not completely friendly. if it's completely friendly, well, that's just a debate--just a neutral comparison of points. it's not an argument. if there's no bite, there's no technique--using technique is bite.
The flipside to that the argument stops being fun if you take it too seriously--if you go from "not completely friendly" to "pure vitriol". If you're pissed, and you're picking apart your opponent's arguments rather than his points because you're too blindly angry, too invested in winning, to stop and listen--man, that's just juvenile. Take some anger management classes. (They help, no joke.)
Which brings me me to the CE boards. As much as I like a good argument... it just really seems that almost everyone there is really angry, all the time. Every single issue becomes this massive crusade, where everybody has to prove how in touch they are and how insensitive everyone else is being about whatever random topic set the whole thing off. I mean, people putting each other on ignore over chicken pox? Seriously? People lament the lack of intelligent conservative posters but good lord, anytime anyone says anything that anyone else disagrees with, someone declares a damn jihad. It's almost never enough to simply disagree with someone on any given point. The board-wide standard is to try to prove that the person who disagrees with you isn't simply of a different opinion--they're dullards who are criminally uninformed and/or completely morally deficient.
It's really taking all the fun out of arguing.
The flipside to that the argument stops being fun if you take it too seriously--if you go from "not completely friendly" to "pure vitriol". If you're pissed, and you're picking apart your opponent's arguments rather than his points because you're too blindly angry, too invested in winning, to stop and listen--man, that's just juvenile. Take some anger management classes. (They help, no joke.)
Which brings me me to the CE boards. As much as I like a good argument... it just really seems that almost everyone there is really angry, all the time. Every single issue becomes this massive crusade, where everybody has to prove how in touch they are and how insensitive everyone else is being about whatever random topic set the whole thing off. I mean, people putting each other on ignore over chicken pox? Seriously? People lament the lack of intelligent conservative posters but good lord, anytime anyone says anything that anyone else disagrees with, someone declares a damn jihad. It's almost never enough to simply disagree with someone on any given point. The board-wide standard is to try to prove that the person who disagrees with you isn't simply of a different opinion--they're dullards who are criminally uninformed and/or completely morally deficient.
It's really taking all the fun out of arguing.
Interesting take on arguing. "You can use words to tangle up and undo the point your opponent is trying to make--you probably won't convince him, because he retains his internal idea of what his point is, but you can prevent him from convincing anyone else"
Is there any point in a private argument between two people, then?