mooncalf2

alienz is right about the first bit. (your last entry)
if you really both care about each other, you will work it out any way you can. (since you clearly are of the mindset that you will not do this again ever ever ever ever ever, i think you'll work through it)
i've been there done that, trust me.
in regards to the second part (the big O), you need to masterbate first. a LOT. if you can work out what it is that you like, and what gets you going, going, gone, then you can work towards another person doing it to you.
keep in mind that sex is a lotta fun, even without a climax at the end, too. if you keep in mind that it's about getting your rocks off and enjoying each other's bodies and how good they feel, and yeah the love stuff too, and focus less on forcing an O, that in fact the O will come more easily because of it.
try new things as well, to mentally cut ties with 'old times' that you didn't orgasm.
ie: bath play, outdoors, kitchen table, using toys, watchoing pron, wearing a full latex gimp suit, whatever does it for you.
this is a NEW BEGINNING. go forward and enjoy !!!

and when you do ahine, it'll be so fucking bright, you'll outshine the sun!