Its hard to give up something thats been in your life for so long. I was 22 when I started down this roadthe getting things for being naked road. Modeling, dancing, flirting and just generally batting my eyes through life. Its a bullshit way to live and lord, I wish I had never started.
As always, as I will get tattooed on me some day, what good has ever come from being so wanted?
I had good times and I met some good people. But I carry a lot of baggage. I wonder what I will do with myself when I cant look in the mirror and rely on clear blue eyes and a big smile. I want terribly to start fresh.
I want an internet free life where comment numbers dont dash my self confidence. I want to live with my boyfriend, cooking vegan meals, playing with our dogs, laying in the sun in a city far away from any other bad influence but myself. I want to grow up and get better.
She pretty much summed up my feelings on life right now.
I'm in Columbus now. It's a lot more work than I expected, and I miss my bearman, puppy, and peach very much. But hanging out with Gigi_LaRoux on the reg is super awesome. I drank for the first time in a very long time, and let me tell you....I canNOT hang like I used to. I spent the entire morning puking my guts out. I puked like 5 or 6 times; it was awful. I've definitely satisfied my urge to booze for quite some time now.
I have a budding little family of tattoos on my arm these days:
And today, I toughed out my hangover, and added one more to the clan:
Somehow I managed to not puke during this. But my headache was RAGING.
RONI!!!! I am officially a creepy dog lady! He was done by Scott Santee, the same guy who did Ashbury_'s Boston Terrier tattoo.
Off to nurse my wounds.
Lurve,
Monroe
