monroe

Same shit different week.

Work. Booze. Break/Forget/Lose stuff. Rinse. Repeat.

Last night was especially ridiculous though. I went to this video premeire for Square One BMX because NicoleLee models their clothes. There were so many people-- it was insane. I got retarded drunk. Afterwards I went to a friend's house with a few other people. Some dude cut his arm-- we think on a mirrror-- but for no apparent reason he insisted that I KNIFED him!?!? He kept saying "I know it was her! She's got a blade!" So. Fucking. Weird. But it gets weirder-- then he SLAPPPED me, like really HARD! The details are a bit fuzzy because like I said, I was very drunk-- but that is what went down, to the best of my recollection and from what I've been able to piece together through other people.

And when I woke up this morning I realized I have somehow lost my keys AGAIN. The SECOND time in two months. I don't know what the fuck I'm gonna do. Even though my landlord is an old turd of a burntout hippieish dude, I'm embarassed to go to him to get a new key becase I can tell he already looks down on me.

I get frustrated with myself because I never feel like I can quite get it together. I'm a little tornado of destruction. My mom always says I need a babysitter, not a boyfriend. I can't remember anything for the life of me. I'm messy. I'm scatterbrained. I'm clumsy. I'm irresponsible. I've been like this my whole life! I suppose it's just who I am and I should learn to accept it, and I know everyone has to rely on others to a degree....buuut I don't know. I guess I just hate that I always have to have someone behind me, cleaning up my mess-- both literally and figuratively. I'd like to be able to be more self-sufficient. I've tried, with mediocre--at best--results.

I just watched The Science of Sleep and it was amazing. AMAZING. Seriously, check it out if you haven't already. Parallel Syncronized Randomness--that shit is real. Additionally, Gael Garcia Bernal is a very sexy man.

Now, I go to bed.

Goodnight.