This is a guide for taking your first steps into the world of sex.
Sex starts at home (or in the alley behind burger hut for me). Before taking the steps to find a willing partner to engage in sexual activity maybe practice on yourself first, I find it enjoyable to pleasure myself by vigorously touching my genitalia until my face contorts to resemble Quasimodo eating bees and I let out a cry similar to a wolf that’s caught it’s nutsack on a barbed wire fence. I can provide full instructions on how to achieve orgasmic bliss in a private space designed for elderly chimps, just message me.
once you’ve got the hang of self pleasure it’s time to find a willing other. I find the best place to meet a prospective mate is the bowling alley, as the person bends down to put on the wet and still warm shoes, perform an erotic dance in their peripheral vision, they’ll find it so overwhelming security will be called to escort your naked oiled gyrating body from the premises.