ok so right now im in reno
i had to leave visqueen for a couple days cuz my cousin is getting married. ill meet up with them again in sacto.
the last couple days has been good. people arnt comming out in huge crowds but the people who do really seem to be into it.
its kinda a weird time for me perosnally. the love of my life is leaving me to take advantage of all that life has to offer. its really hard for me to be supportive cuz the selfish side of me really doesnt want her to go. but i know she needs to do this and i honestly want the best for her and apperntly, rignt now, im not it.
thats hard to deal with, my inital inclination is to be insulted. my insecurities insist ill never find anyone who i can love and respect as much as jenny, and my logical self agrees. but the last thing i want is to be a weight around the neck of the one that i love.
i probably never deserved the wonderful experience that has been the last few years. and i shold just be happy i got to experience it lasted.
its tuff though, just knowing that she is leaving soon.
i had to leave visqueen for a couple days cuz my cousin is getting married. ill meet up with them again in sacto.
the last couple days has been good. people arnt comming out in huge crowds but the people who do really seem to be into it.
its kinda a weird time for me perosnally. the love of my life is leaving me to take advantage of all that life has to offer. its really hard for me to be supportive cuz the selfish side of me really doesnt want her to go. but i know she needs to do this and i honestly want the best for her and apperntly, rignt now, im not it.
thats hard to deal with, my inital inclination is to be insulted. my insecurities insist ill never find anyone who i can love and respect as much as jenny, and my logical self agrees. but the last thing i want is to be a weight around the neck of the one that i love.
i probably never deserved the wonderful experience that has been the last few years. and i shold just be happy i got to experience it lasted.
its tuff though, just knowing that she is leaving soon.
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screw_that:
I don't really know your situation too well, but I can say, take heart in the fact that you have had these last few years with her and now, you are giving her what she needs, what will be best for her -- even if that is space.. it sucks and it hurts, but know that you are helping her.. I'm sure it's just as tough for her. Things will get better... they have to.. and when you get back to Seattle, you need to come back to karaoke and rock us, 'cuz we need the help!
nimhly:
*hug
