monkeybuttt

43.

it's FRIDAYYYY!!!!!



i used to steal semen from my brother's pillowcase and put it on the cupcakes in my fridge.

my name used to be larriconus. i changed it to sam smeede though when i thought i was going to die in the middle of the night. i woke up and thought 'where is my mind? i cannot find it.' and then i was unable to urinate for 4 days.

once upon a time i saw you there in the sunlight smiling like the last lord of creation, a happy vision in pink and a friend indeed. you weren't there, though, but i saw you anyway.

hi, my time is near. the moon is fat tonight. i will drink the blood of some lucky virgin.

shit, man, where is your face?

look here, jimmy, is that your shit in my luggage? day-um, boy, you gots the serious trots!