Dont have a job to begin with, and work release is really hard to get.
But I was walking in the chow line and this guard started to look at me funny and called me into her office later, she is the sergeant, the boss of all the other guards.
Turns out she is an old friend of the family, used to smoke pot with my dad and all this and recognized me.
After I told her what I was in for and all that she actually used the phrase 'well you're hooked up now'.
So I get out on work release and just sit around my house all day. I don't even get searched when I go back in.
She told all the guards I was her nephew.
So now the guards all keep asking me if anyone is fucking with me.
Which they're not. I can easily mentally overpower any of the retard fucking inmates in there. Even the very large alpha male types don't fuck with me because, well, y'know, you just have to show them you won't back down from them if they fuck with you and they stop. Some of the more timid younger guys CLEARLY made that mistake when they first got in and they just get TORMENTED.
So all the guards ask me who has contraband and shit, but I just pretend like I'm not wise to the whole situation.
Hell, they only have cigarettes.
Some of those guys are in there for a year or more and don't get work release and shit, I would go nuts.
Besides, I smoke with them.
I had briefly considered blackmailing them for their cigarettes, but I don't want to tip my hand to the fact that the boss guard is 'my aunt'.
Besides, all I had to do the first day was talk about Thailand a lot and I got instant cred.
I have to tell several of the more lurid tales over and over because inmates keep asking.
On the other hand, the food fucking SUCKS and I make sure to eat a lot when I'm out here on work release.
I fasted yesterday because no one gets out on Sundays and the food is just THAT bad.
No one gets out on Saturdays either, usually, but I'm special.
Mostly I keep to myself when I'm there. I've been reading 'Myth and ritual in Christianity' which is Alan Watts's rather polemic Jungian breakdown of the Christ mythos from a generally metaphysical standpoint. Great book.
PS:
Today I grouted the shower in the bathroom, listened to a lot of Peter Brotzman and The White Album, found a frame for my large rubbing from Angkor Wat, considered a lucrative buisness opportunity and bought my bestest friend two Ralph Bakshi DVD's for Christmas with the message: 'angelheaded hipsters burning for the ancient heavenly connection to the starry dynamo in the machinery of night'.
ALL OF THIS WHILE SUPPOSEDLY IN JAIL!!!
I go back in a few hours overnight and I get up to leave at 6:30 in the morning.
Fucking savages.
But I was walking in the chow line and this guard started to look at me funny and called me into her office later, she is the sergeant, the boss of all the other guards.
Turns out she is an old friend of the family, used to smoke pot with my dad and all this and recognized me.
After I told her what I was in for and all that she actually used the phrase 'well you're hooked up now'.
So I get out on work release and just sit around my house all day. I don't even get searched when I go back in.
She told all the guards I was her nephew.
So now the guards all keep asking me if anyone is fucking with me.
Which they're not. I can easily mentally overpower any of the retard fucking inmates in there. Even the very large alpha male types don't fuck with me because, well, y'know, you just have to show them you won't back down from them if they fuck with you and they stop. Some of the more timid younger guys CLEARLY made that mistake when they first got in and they just get TORMENTED.
So all the guards ask me who has contraband and shit, but I just pretend like I'm not wise to the whole situation.
Hell, they only have cigarettes.
Some of those guys are in there for a year or more and don't get work release and shit, I would go nuts.
Besides, I smoke with them.
I had briefly considered blackmailing them for their cigarettes, but I don't want to tip my hand to the fact that the boss guard is 'my aunt'.
Besides, all I had to do the first day was talk about Thailand a lot and I got instant cred.
I have to tell several of the more lurid tales over and over because inmates keep asking.
On the other hand, the food fucking SUCKS and I make sure to eat a lot when I'm out here on work release.
I fasted yesterday because no one gets out on Sundays and the food is just THAT bad.
No one gets out on Saturdays either, usually, but I'm special.
Mostly I keep to myself when I'm there. I've been reading 'Myth and ritual in Christianity' which is Alan Watts's rather polemic Jungian breakdown of the Christ mythos from a generally metaphysical standpoint. Great book.
PS:
Today I grouted the shower in the bathroom, listened to a lot of Peter Brotzman and The White Album, found a frame for my large rubbing from Angkor Wat, considered a lucrative buisness opportunity and bought my bestest friend two Ralph Bakshi DVD's for Christmas with the message: 'angelheaded hipsters burning for the ancient heavenly connection to the starry dynamo in the machinery of night'.
ALL OF THIS WHILE SUPPOSEDLY IN JAIL!!!
I go back in a few hours overnight and I get up to leave at 6:30 in the morning.
Fucking savages.
VIEW 20 of 20 COMMENTS
It's good to be a deviant. But it's bad to get caught.
Glad to hear that you're getting out soon.
I love the Western Lands.. that trilogy is great. Cities of the Red Night is one of my all-time favorites.. along with the Wild Boys.