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mondrianblue

Member Since 2003

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Wednesday Jan 05, 2005

Jan 5, 2005
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Lets continue the Saga that is Dave's life at the moment, shall we? Its sucking pretty fucking hard, i know this is only the fucking 1000th post where i have said that and already i have lost thoses who will read this post till the end. i apologize.
But lets see i got my Dentists bill for just an evaluation/diagnosis 208.00 now. awesome , lol i have to drop one of my classes so i can remain full time so i can pay that shit, then when my wisdoms come out (i dont want to think about it) ill have to pay that fucking shit because i cant afford insurance, lol fun, fun. gang.
My dad found a car of intrest for me but its 600.00 dollars a mazda something. though my money in the bank, is like 25.00 , fuck and i have to buy fucking oil paint and brushes for my Oil Painting Class, and have to get notebooks and shit, and oh yeah that shit called Gas. Dad said he would ask about it and see if they would take 50bucks to hold it for a couple weeks, im not getting my hopes up on this one. fuck i havent had my hopes up in a while, as all of you know. They always get crushed, they always come crashing down. im cursed to never have anything nice. Fuck when i went out to the car this morning to clean it off (its fucking snowing hard here, the roads are fucking shit) i tore my fucking jacket on fucking door, i just got the fucker in october. hopefully by dropping that class ill get some money back to pay the dentist, fun fun. In other news im reading the last book of the Dark Tower series which is awesome. thats one thing that can make happy. Reading for me is a good way to escape. I can still be hopeful maybe something good will come out of all this shit. there has to be a balance dont you think? i wont just keep getting shit on and die in obsurity . will i? what kind of life would that be? what purpose would it serve? i strive to help others, yet no one seems to help me. why is this? maybe i will find the answer to this question that has been bothering me since i first became consious of the problem. I dont think Karma can explain this. it has to be clearer then that.
Wow that was Esoteric dont you think?
Any advice gang?
I also keep having these reoccuring dreams where im in need of help and i have a phone but i cant dial a number or make the phone work, and im all by my self untill i wake up or die in the dream.
Any thoughts on this dream? id apreciate any interptation.
Thanks everyone have a good week
Dave.

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