mondrianblue

Whats up?
My dog died sunday so im not in a very good mood at the moment. We had him for 13yrs, and i was at work when he passed away, my mother got to watch him die. im kinda weird, im not really taking it all that well, because like i dont fully realize he is gone yet, i know your like " its just a freaking dog..." but my dog was more then that. like ill be at work and ill just think of something like, how ill get to see him when i get home waiting for me, and then im like wait... no he wont. then i start to tear up and the people at work dont ask me whats wrong, they just ingnore me like everybody does, but with trapus, he was always paying attention to me sometimes more then i wished but i never disliked him for always wanting to be around me and underneath my feet because he was like the only being that was there for me when my dad was in the hospital and my parents were getting a devoirce. He would lay buy my feet while i slept to protect me from what ever lurked in the darkness , and would get up and follow me to the bathroom when i got up in the night to keep watch over me to make sure id be fine, he would always be there when i got home from school,after everyone would taunt, and make fun of me, and make me hate my self but he made me feel better, he was always there and now he is gone. and i cant really uuite grasp that fact because i still expect him to be laying in the kitchen waiting for me to walk thru and rub up against my leg and look up with his little eyes while i bend down to pat him on the head and play with his ears and rub my nose against his. but hes not there.........