moderncutthroat

I said something careless and hurt the love of my life.

Now I don't know where we stand or whether anything will ever be alright again.

I can't stop thinking about penis.


Seriously.

Just paid for another year of SG.

Been playing the Wii.

Waiting for my Wii to arrive in the mail.

Planning a mini-vacation to see Justin.

Sending said beautiful boy by the name of Justin dirty text messages laced with nude pictures.

He worked a 12 hour shift today and works again at 6am. It's the least I can do.

Working too.

Someone I go to college with started work at my job today. It's like...
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Atleast I thought I was alright.

Until I got off the phone with him .last night and sort of cried myself to sleep.

I couldn't even play my MMO last night.

Nothing is wrong with my life except for his absence and it feels like a piece of me is missing.

Things are good.

Grades are okay.
Work has started.

The only thing missing is Justin and since we both just started work there's no chance of either one of us taking any days off.

But it's alright.

I'm alright. I miss him, but I can deal.

I am horny.

And sexually frustrated.

and lonely.

I am currently reading the novel House of Leaves.

It's trippy as fuck.

I am slightly afraid of my house now.

It's been one week since I left Justin 2 hours away and I'm not as loony as I thought I'd be.

He recommended a book to me "The House of Leaves". He says it's a mindfuck and I trust his literary critique as we are both literature majors. It just came in the mail from Amazon! (In 2, not 3-5 days as was stated)

I've...
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Please don't leave me.

We went to dinner.
We went to my house.
He went to leave and I started sobbing. I couldn't stop crying and that was a little alarming.
I've always been able to control my emotions to a certain degree.
What makes me feel so silly is that we're making plans to see each other during the summer.
I already know that...
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