missmoth

I've started to write down the dates of when I go through bad spells, I'm hoping there will be some sort of pattern. Then I just realized what will I do when / if I find out there's a pattern? Sit there and know its coming and wait it out? Its a little bit shit isn't it. For no apparent or real reason I was beyond depressed this weekend, I cried quite a bit and just felt so low. I think it was worse that there was no trigger - even worse that I was with someone that makes me very happy. I know he doesn't think any less of me or is hurt by my mood this weekend.
Sometimes I'm really worried that I'm really boring.
I guess I'm just shy - but there are sometimes that I am really outspoken especially if I am around people that I know or are on a similar intellectual wavelength. I think more often I get intimidated a lot.
I have no idea what I hope to achieve with this blog.

Otherwise generally things are going really well, I really do love my new job - I'm so happy there I feel like I'm appreciated. On costuming I do need to work on my halloween costume - starting tomorrow I need to make another mock up then I'm diving in and getting it done. I have a few photoshoots being planned and other things generally so much feels like midway and I just really do need to gather my shit together.

Well till next time friends and stalkers. x