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missmay

Gem City

Hopeful Since 2008

Followers 459 Following 262

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Thursday Apr 22, 2010

Apr 22, 2010
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Katie,
I really just want to apologize to you for hurting your son. I'm sure he has made me out to be a complete demon, and I can not blame him. I am so sorry for hurting your son and putting him through the pain I caused. There is no excuse for my actions, but people do make mistakes. I am sorry I had to make my mistakes with him. I am sorry it took hurting him for me to grow as a person.
Katie, I am in love with your son and I know there will never be a chance he could ever love me the same as I do. I deserve that though. He doesn't owe me anything. I understand his anger because I caused it. I wish I could go back to the good times we had together. I never thought I'd be in this position with him.
There is one thing I know for sure, he is a good father. I know he will do what he can to be there for our child. I do know I will be a single mother though. In my perfect world, things will be different in the near future. I want to raise this child under one roof and be in love again one day. He has said to me I have a lot to prove to him. How do I prove myself to him when he's so far away?! He doubts everything I do, and I can not blame him. His trust for me is long gone. He wanted me to be this woman I wasn't ready to be. It sucks to say, but it's true, I am who he needs me to be now. I'm too late.
As for the baby, I hope you are happy to be having another grandchild. I love your family and am so sorry to have hurt someone in it. I am doing all I can to make it right. I am extremely severely depresed and the emotional rollercoaster caused from pregnancy alone is making it worse. I am getting help because I don't want baby to have anxiety issues years down the road.
All I have now is knowing I have him in my life for the rest of my life. He may not ever love me or look at me again, but I know I have to prove myself to him and the only way I can do that is to be true to myself. There is no way I can prove anything to him across the country.
All of my prayers have been answered. I prayed, and prayed and prayed I would have Dustin's child. My prayers were answered. My baby is the answer to my prayers. I have faith everything will be okay when baby comes.
Again Katie, I am so deeply sorry for hurting your son. I am sorry I hurt you. I love you and your family and am very happy to be adding someone to it. I hope you forgive me one day for what I've done.

-Casie


DONT WORRY. I DIDNT SEND IT. I JUST WANT TO, REALLY BAD. I'D FEEL BETTER TELLING HER I AM SORRY FOR HURTING HER SON. DAMMIT!! I HAVE TO QUIT THIS!! He doesn't love me and thats the hardest thing I have to accept.

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