an emotionless day. no. i have some emotion. its that little bit of false hope held deep in the pits of my dreams. i dreamt of him all night. we were married, children, sex, love. he sang to me, he ran away with me. he stood up for me and he meant it. it was a dream. i can tell im still living in it, i feel happy knowing i have those thoughts. the pain is all i have to know he was even real. i can taste him, smell him, feel him; none of it real. 