Alright time for some shitty self loathing...
Sometimes i really do feel like a big damn loser. I mean really...i dont do anything. I DONT. Why? Cause i'm really really shy, quiet, and hermit like, and places with a lot of people scare me. Yeah...its sad. I dont party...i'm one year shy of legal drinking here in Amuuurica, so i cant go out drinking at clubs or anything. Not to mention i work third shift, so that basically puts the biggest damper on your social life that you could imagine. I never get a saturday off or anything...so what the fuck. The only nights i have off are week nights, theres nothing to do in this shithole town...fuck i'm so tired of sitting here at the computer on these nights wishing i had somewhere better to be...but even if i did...i would probably be way too antisocial about it to fucking go. I HATE ANXIETY PROBLEMS!!!!!! Fuck man. Fuck this. Fuck all of this. I hope things get better once I move to Lansing...i mean they should...its one of the bigger towns we have in michigan. I just want to get away from this shithole and go somewhere where things actually happen. Fuck this place. Fuck fuck fuck. I hate feeling like this. I'm so socially inept. I wish i wasnt. I wish the thought of meeting new people didnt make me want to vomit in fear. I wish you understood.
Sometimes i really do feel like a big damn loser. I mean really...i dont do anything. I DONT. Why? Cause i'm really really shy, quiet, and hermit like, and places with a lot of people scare me. Yeah...its sad. I dont party...i'm one year shy of legal drinking here in Amuuurica, so i cant go out drinking at clubs or anything. Not to mention i work third shift, so that basically puts the biggest damper on your social life that you could imagine. I never get a saturday off or anything...so what the fuck. The only nights i have off are week nights, theres nothing to do in this shithole town...fuck i'm so tired of sitting here at the computer on these nights wishing i had somewhere better to be...but even if i did...i would probably be way too antisocial about it to fucking go. I HATE ANXIETY PROBLEMS!!!!!! Fuck man. Fuck this. Fuck all of this. I hope things get better once I move to Lansing...i mean they should...its one of the bigger towns we have in michigan. I just want to get away from this shithole and go somewhere where things actually happen. Fuck this place. Fuck fuck fuck. I hate feeling like this. I'm so socially inept. I wish i wasnt. I wish the thought of meeting new people didnt make me want to vomit in fear. I wish you understood.
tankboi:
i know how you feel, i'm such a quiet little loser until i have WAY too many drinks in me. then i am totally abnoxious and generally rude, leaving me too embarrassed to talk to any poor soul that may have encountered me last time around. it's a vicious cycle. i often feel like that Zoloft lump,on the TV.
evldedgrl:
social anxiety does suck, i am also a sufferer... but you just gotta get out there and suck it up, go out with friends then you don't really have to worry about much. 