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Eloy

Member Since 2004

Followers 73 Following 65

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Sunday Apr 16, 2006

Apr 16, 2006
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These next few weeks are going to be killer with getting ready for graduation. I have like 6 tests to do in one class! Procrastination is such a bitch!!!! Every year I do it. Every year I regret it. Well, such is life being a mom, a wife, a full time employee and a full time student!

I've been feeling down lately. I think the pregnancy hormones this time around aren't doing the jovial thing like last time. Between the stress of work , and school, the nausiousness (sp?), house work, and the pounds that are packing on, I just am not feeling the love for myself. I'm sure after May 13th comes and goes and I'm done with school, life will seem a little easier and hopefully I can enjoy my pregnancy a bit more.

My mom even told me today "It looks like something's bothering you." I just told her I'm tired. I don't want her to worry about me, and although I really am tired, like 80% of the time, I know it's more than that. I just feel that I look like a trainwreck all the time, and it sucks. That with the stress of my every day life and those raging hormones has gotten me down in the dumps.

Plus last night I had horrible dreams. It started out that I was miscarrying the baby. It felt so real too. In the dream, I woke up in the bed all bloody. Then the dream progressed into Jason responding to terrible calls at work and having a hard time with them. I don't remember specifics, but I know it was making me scared for him. Ever since he's been a cop, I haven't found myself overly worried about him. Last night I was after that dream. Well, it was 3am when I woke up from that dream, and he wasn't home yet. He'd text messaged me that he was responding to a late call. So I called him and he was still on the call, but everything was fine. After having that dream, it was torture waiting for that call to go through. So, if you're the praying type, keep cops, or at least my cop in your prayers, and if you're not the praying kind, just remember to support those who provide public safety.

Okay, now that I'm all turned to mush, and have tears coming in the back of my eyes... I'm getting to bed. I finished all the homework I possibly can for one night and I have to go to bed. I didn't do like 10 things I should've tonight. Making the kids lunch, finishing laundry and vacuuming, but at this point, I would fall over trying to even do one of those things!

Sighhhh, good night.
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
cest_la_mae:
I'm giving you a massage (psycically) right now. I'm starting with your feet.

Thanks for taking the time to happy birthday me. kiss
May 1, 2006
annamei:
we missed you guys last night kiss

jason is smart, he has a lot of reasons to keep himself safe smile
May 7, 2006

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