Monday Mar 24, 2003

0
any of you know how to be alone? can someone
teach me, because i'm killing myself trying...

this past weekend I saw a strange movie called
"of freaks and men". last night "taxi driver",
again... ate a shit load of canned peaches...
apparently I was mean to my friend... she emailed
me today all pissed off. sometimes I say things
that i later regret. but I say them nevertheless.
And I don't have that many friends to be saying
mean things to... Last week I hooked up with
two people. One was a friend, the other was
my ex... I tore her freaking tank top in half...
I don't know what to think anymore, or how
to bring at least some sanity into my life.
My heart belongs to you, my body belongs to
no one, I wanted to say to her, but I didn't.
You know why? because her heart doesn't belong
to me and her body belongs to everyone...
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
relethed:
how to be alone:

hang out in crowds.

attend parties where you know you will end up sitting in a corner on a beat-up green chair

get a service-industry job, where you will be a product and not a person

do not stand up for yourself when "friends" or foes tromp on you



these are all techniques in which i've engaged. but the impulse to communion always wins out.

how can we possibly be alone? we just can't take it. and how can we be with people? our only options for belonging and togetherness are the companies of people as F-ed up as ourselves.....

i'm sorry your sitch with your ex has been so hard on you.
*hugs*
gingerlie:
its not boston, but if youd like i can send you an artists application form if you want to email me your address. you have to submit a portfolio and then we look at it and let you know. we dont do anything face to face at the beginning.

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