mirkywaters

Lets see. I was told I needed to update. I really don't have that exciting of a life to talk about. I have been working out on Martha's Vineyard for the last three months remodeling a home. But I can't wait to finish and get back up to Maine for the fall. My girlfriend can't wait too. Speaking of, she must be cheating on me by now. I don't have any proof. Really I just wonder why somneone would stick around for someone who is never around. She either lives a very uncomplicated life and doesn't mind being alone and doesn't mind NOT having sex regularly or she has someone else she sees on the side when I am not around. Or maybe she actually loves me. And I am just projecting my insecurities because it is I who is growing tired of spending more time apart than together. Its like this, when we are together, man I want to hump like rabbits and she just doesn't seem that interested. When I travel back up there its every other weekend. And we do it maybe twice when I would prefer twice a day. Seeing how as I am going to have to go with out for two whole weeks. She makes it seem like she doesn't mind.Arrgghh!! I understand she wants quality time too. So don't I. I take her out for dinners, lunch, even breakfast. We play tennis together. We watch the ball games together. Play Yahtze in the park. We share lots of moments. I even spoil her with tons of gifts. Yet come intimate time I just wish she wanted it as much as I do. I have to do all the "wooing" and the turning on. Which isn't much of a turn on for me. It becomes a vicious cycle.
I guess everything I wrote basically leads me to this. I don't feel that she is as passionate about me as I am about her. Kinda making me feel like the passion is really just infatuation. On my part. And infatuation wears off.
I guess we have alot to tlalk about. I don't know what we will resolve but we need to be honest with each other if anything.
Well, I guess I rambled enough about my unhappiness trying to be happy.
I just want a woman who is spontaneous and passionate and outgoing as well as self confident, intelligent, funny, and gorgeous. Is that asking for too much.....