mirima

What a beautiful and sorrowful ceremony today, in honor of my dear friend who passed away from cancer. Death took her at a very young age. She would have turned twenty today. There was not a dry eye in sight. Although, it was wonderful to be in Colin's arms again. I missed him so much. The moment I saw him, he wrapped his long arms around me, and held me so tightly. I breathed him in, sensing his familiar smell, his feel...it was all bittersweet and too brief in my opinion.

I'm still struggling with myself and my relationship(s). There are so many complications, so many things to ponder. I'm wondering if this will last. I know these things don't last for long, but I hope they last longer than this. There is some newness to my life though, and with that comes excitement...but it's all part of the complications.

I love so intensely, and then get intensely sad. I'm worried about me more than anything right now. I'm not sure I can balance so many things at once. I need my life to be simpler...and I have some ideas, but not only are they not always being executed, but they often don't work. I need new ideas.