mira77

I've become somewhat affected by the the breakdown in this world surrounding religions. I've come to the idea that there are too many relgions in this word, each teaching conflicting ideas, leading to dispute and wars.

I've thought long and hard about this and the only idea I can come up with is to adopt the newly created Squirral religion. It seems the only way to get out of this mess. Granted the theology is based soley around nuts but what isn't?

It's said that in 1975 a young squirral climbed a tree and in that tree he found some parchments. On them were the rules for the future squirral religion, setting out Dogma and docterine and instructions on the faith. But squirrals can't read so he ate the parchments. Now we shall never know what the parchments said but using computers and witness accounts from other squirrals (who also couldn't speak so we've discounted them) we've managed to put together the followiing:

Here be the rules to attain the status of Squirral reverence:
1-Find your nuts
2-At all times keep your nuts close
3-Do not bury your nuts, as you may lose your nuts
4-If you are sitting down, you must nibble your nuts
5-If caught nibbling your nuts, run up a tree
6-Do not covet anothers nuts
7-If it gets cold, sleep
8-If you sleep, sleep close your nuts
9-If you wear red, avoid anything grey
10-If you wear grey, chase after anyhting red

We live by our nuts and our nuts are life giving to us. Without our nuts we would disappear so we rever the nuts and the nuts are our God. Yes, my nuts are God. So we daily praise the nuts and show them to the sun. and so we live....by our nuts.

Now this was just a computer projection so we have no idea if it's true, but having had a chat with a squirral in a pub a few months back I can kind of piece it all together. I ordered some nuts and he prayed to them and ran away with them so what can i say. It must be true....so must we all love nuts?