There was a time a few years ago when, for reasons I cannot fully comprehend still, I seemed to get very lucky in love. It felt like for a few years that if I fell for a girl somehow she also fell for me. Most of those relationships lasted a few months each, but they were all still very special to me and helped build my confidence.
After moving to Argentina I lost all of it. Not knowing Spanish was probably the killer. Not being able to flirt in the native language made things so much more difficult and I didn't date anyone for two years. The girl I did date, although she was Argentinian, spoke perfect English. But the thing is I can't rely on that.
I've never been the cutest cute in any room. So, for me I always had to count on my personality and sense of humor. I've worn glasses since I was 3 and from the years of 2000 to 2012 I put on about 50 lbs. Neither of these things worked in my favor.
But since moving to Buenos Aires I started dieting. I can't say how much weight I've lost because I don't actually bother checking, but I am getting much closer to my goal look. And this year I plan on getting lasik eye surgery. With these two things coming together at once I think I'll be able to get my confidence back. But what troubles me is that if these changes get me the kind of attention I think they might inside I'm going to be somewhat troubled. I feel like people should be able to be interested in me, not just my looks. I've read that this happens to a lot of people when they've lost significant amounts of weight. That it's still difficult to come to terms with your inner doubts.
