mineux

Its back again. The same illness that brought me to my knees. Made me beg, spit and swear for mercy. Is this my new reaction to stress? When the going gets tough and the tough feel left behind and heartbroken; proceed to purge the body, insert creepy dreams, and immediately go to a dramamine and a water diet??

I feel it crawling thru my gut, pushing things aside. My anxiety goes straight to my body. It feels like last time, only i am fighting giving in to tears now. And as the tears back up, the bile in my throat rises, chokes my air, leaves me breathless and sweating.

This pain is like a 2005 hurricane... i feel it off the coast of my body, heavy rains sweep in at me, and i know the worst is yet to come. So i pack my things and prepare myself to be knocked into twigs again. Water? check. Dramamine? on the list. Clean the cat area? today. Do all my laundry? today.... Today.... Today is the tommorow i was worried about yesterday. Funny when you wake up and can feel that the worries were neccesary.

♥"I know i should go, but i follow you like a girl possesed, theres a traitor here beneath my breast, and if my heart could beat it would break my chest, but i can see your unimpressed."♥