I'm so tired. Of everything. Atlas would not even offer to carry my heavy spirits.
I hate complaining, so I'm sorry to be such a drain, but I want something good to happen in my life, I want a real glimmer of sunshine, not an illusory flame. Or is this how it is supposed to be always? I'm not even sure that if something good did happen that it'd actually make me happy. I'm not sure what "good" means any more. I feel like I've spent my whole life trying to emotionally cope with everyone else's problems, juggle their needs, address their wants, and don't understand how to deal with my own, apart from being at the mercy of logic. Then I thought maybe if I was with someone then that would solve everything- but I know in my heart that it won't. Another person cannot complete you. So what the fuck now?
Jesus, what a rant. AnArtStar shouldn't be worried about his journal entry at all.
Fuck this shit. I'm going to the Tamara de Lempika exhibition in London to wander like a lost soul for a while.
Lots of love to you all.
mxx
I hate complaining, so I'm sorry to be such a drain, but I want something good to happen in my life, I want a real glimmer of sunshine, not an illusory flame. Or is this how it is supposed to be always? I'm not even sure that if something good did happen that it'd actually make me happy. I'm not sure what "good" means any more. I feel like I've spent my whole life trying to emotionally cope with everyone else's problems, juggle their needs, address their wants, and don't understand how to deal with my own, apart from being at the mercy of logic. Then I thought maybe if I was with someone then that would solve everything- but I know in my heart that it won't. Another person cannot complete you. So what the fuck now?
Jesus, what a rant. AnArtStar shouldn't be worried about his journal entry at all.
Fuck this shit. I'm going to the Tamara de Lempika exhibition in London to wander like a lost soul for a while.
Lots of love to you all.
mxx
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
Check your email.
damn typos
[Edited on Aug 24, 2004 3:59AM]
i wish i could find the words to help you with the way you are feeling today- but i got a feeling that even if i did, it wouldn't help much.
the only reason i say this is because i feel that way sometimes, and nothing anyone could say to me helps!!
i hope the exhibition takes your mind off your thoughts for a couple of hours at least, and if all else fails... just try and picture eric idle nailed to the cross at the end of 'life of brian'
take care
adam x