mike732g

I wish I was still in highschool playing lacrosse with the team of my brothers. It's amazing last year that I had no worries. I was fat, ugly, and stupid but I didn't care all that mattered was I was playing a sport that I loved with my brothers I loved more. It's said "change is good," but now that I lost all the weight I'm always looking at myself in the mirror feeling fat, hating myself for having a bite of a unhealthy food, and now my self esteem is worst. Last year I had so many friends, now I hardly have any; I feel so distant from everybody. Having friends distracted me in a good way, but now I'm here lonely fighting long nights of depression. College being so fucking stressful just puts a cherry on top of everything. Everybody is making friends in college, but I feel like I'm the only one who is not. I sware if I didn't have a job or gym membership to take up my time I wouldn't be here. I want to go back to last year where nothing mattered. I don't care about looking good, having a girlfriend, or doing good in school I just want my friends all back. This is a new kind of depression for me