mightyjim4

Ok boys and girls...as we all know a certain holiday is slowly creeping up on us, and I'm already hearing the bitching about it. "Gawd it's such a Hallmark holiday." "Just another way to get people to spend a lot of money for no reason." "Fuckin people walking around rubbing it in everybody's face that they've got somebody."

...etc, etc...

Or, you get all your friends driving you nuts because you're single..."OOOOmygod we have to find you someone! You CAN'T be alone on Valentine's day! Are you looking at that girl? Let me go talk to her for you." (not making this one up)

To this I say one thing....people, just chill.

It's a day. It's not even like a real holiday or anything, cause the bank and post office are open. No one's going to suffer eternal torment because they were alone on Valentine's day. And if you do have somebody, you don't need to drive your single friends nuts about it. I currently am living the lonely life. Do I think it sucks that I can't find that special girl that's out there somewhere? Yes, it sucks ass...it sucks BIG ass...like JLo in 20 years sized ass...like Anna Nicole Smith during the drugged out crazy years sized ass. It sucks huge ass.

But does it suck that I'm alone? No. I'm cool with it. I'd like to find someone special but it's not causing me any undue grief that I haven't. I do not need someone else to define myself. I'm one cool muthafucker, and being single gives me the opportunity to do things like be nerdy on the internet at 6 AM, go partying with the cool-ass friends I have, and to flirt with as many cute women as possible without getting chewed out for it.

And on the whole "Hallmark holiday" issue...no one in the card and gift industry is pointing a gun at you and making you spend the money. And if your significant other is going to be angry if you don't spend the gross national product of Tibet on your V-day festivities then I think it's time you took a serious look at your relationship. V-day is about celebrating the love you have, not defining it by a dollar amount. If memory serves, the best V-day in my past involved a $1.50 card, a small bouquet of carnations, and spending the better part of the afternoon going at it like a pair of hedgehogs in heat (caring, sensitive hedgehogs mind you)...there might have also been pizza later. The point being, well besides to put that disturbing image in your heads, is that it wasn't about consumerism...we were just happy we could spend the day together cause we were in love.

So, let's all chill on the Valentine's day hatin'...if you've got somebody, don't worry about being all flashy and just do something special for them. If you're unattached, don't let anybody make you feel bad about it.

And if you know one of those annoying fucknuts that just has to tell anyone they can corner in a 5 mile radius about the expensive ego-inflating plans they've made for V-day in an effort to look better then everyone else...go ahead and smack the shit out of 'em, cause they're just reenforcing the V-day stereotype.