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mf_ryan

paducah

Member Since 2004

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Saturday Jun 02, 2007

Jun 1, 2007
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so it's been a strange two days, and since no one is ever going to read this, and i seem to not be able to sleep, i'm just going to put it all down here.

so there's this girl, she's pretty great, and i seem to have developed a bit of a crush on her. we have hung out the last two days, and it's been really fun. but i dont think she's into me. my friends do, but i guess i'm just too dense. she's just coming off a weird relationship, and i'm not exactly at my best, but that's the subject of the next paragraph. i really dont know what to do. this girl is pretty great, beautiful, a bit on the nerdy side. and she even has a scrunchy nose. which i have a soft spot for. i really wish i could just sleep on it, but the whole insomnia thing is really working against me.

so i'm enjoying learning how to be a barrista, and i love everything about the place i work for, but today i learned something that i really could have gone without. most of my relationship problems stem from one girl. she destroyed every bit of my self esteem over a few years, and i still have lingering social anxiety due to the devastation that was our relationship. and now the reception for her wedding is at MY coffee shop. WTF. at least i dont have to work, but really, hasent she caused enough problems. this girl is evil. and i mean spawn of hell evil. at least she doesnt live in town, so i never have to see her again. and i'm pretty sure that if she ever comes into the shop i can treat her like shit and refuse service and not get fired.

i'm going to try to learn to play another song on the banjo. and maybe get some more sleep.
i want to say that i hope tomorrow will be better than today, but today wasnt really that bad, i just hope something gives. i hope that something changes tomorrow. better or worse, at least i wont be in a holding pattern anymore

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