meta

blah, blah.

long story short,

friend's puppy died
Mark and I broke up
I'm moving back home
it's been raining for days
rain brings all the crazy people to the library
I am moving back home.

I think I am ok with all this. but I will still slam doors because, god damnit, I've wasted so much of my life on this kind of shit. going along with things so as not to hurt someone, so as to make their lives 1.3% easier, all the while ruining my own. I destroy myself for people and then I take them down with me. fucking a.

I really wish puppies wouldn't die. or bunnies or kitties or the birds in my back yard. it is easy to drown when it's been raining since you were born.



I'm just tired of wasted effort and there's a fuck of a lot left to do. numero uno: get a therapist.

you don't know the history of psychiatry. I DO.