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meranda

Member Since 2003

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Monday May 10, 2004

May 9, 2004
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up with the sun yet again...i think this is the third or fourth time in the past couple of weeks. damn jesse and his five am shift. ah well...i needed to come home and get my art portfolio together.

gah wednesday drawing class is the last chance i'll have to ask brandon to hang out. i want interesting friends damn it!
it's going to be a pot luck final project critique. WHAT FOOD AM I GOING TO BRING?! eeek

yesterday's entry was whiny as hell...so sorry about that. it actually turned out to be a surprisingly good day afterall.
i got to catch up with byron...and then jake called! which was awesome. i haven't talked to him since fall of last year. i so miss him. i've been meaning to write to him but i just never really got the nerve up to call his parents and ask them his address.
i really wish that kid would stop fucking up his life. he's so funny and so...just plain awesome...he could go very far if he just stayed out of trouble with the law. it makes me sad...really sad...so i just won't think about it! i mean, it is pretty amazing that he can still sound like himself and still be hilarious after being in prison for six months [for the second time!!! and he's only 19]...so that says a lot for his character. i know i'd probably have a nervous breakdown and not eat and then hang myself with a bedsheet...

but that's just me. whatever

anyway...i realize i need to be more positive. i don't want to lie to myself...i don't want to fake it...i want it to be real. and that's where the difficulty lies.
i think byron said it perfectly when he said i need to love people more. i have so much resentment toward my fellow human beings...it's really pathetic and i don't want to become one of those people who hides their insecurities by acting like they're better than everyone ele. i need to get off that track.

just gotta keep working at it!

well today is yet another monday. amazing how the weeks are seriously flying by. it seems like everyday is a monday. which i don't mind. i favor mondays over, say, thursdays...and sundays are absolutely my least favorite day. i think that stems from the time my house caught on fire on a sunday. or maybe the fact that sundays symbolize the death of the week.

just goes to show that i should embace change. the death of one week is the birth of another.

okay starting to get exceptionally sappy. puke

haha. i think i could handle becoming a morning person. i could use a few more hours in the day.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
benni:
i've tried rubbing off harder on people, but then the cops come... and i don't have pants on... whatever blush uh... nevermind. biggrin
May 11, 2004
james:
hey there, im replying to your post but my brain is so fried i forgot exactly what you put. but it seems like you have your hands full, good luck.
May 11, 2004

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