so i finally talked to jesse's mom last night about what's going on with my mom situation [oh how appropriate that i'm talking about moms and it's mother's day]...and our conversation just furthered my realization that i am quite far behind other 20-year-olds on the basis of understanding the "outside" world...feeling like i can handle thing...taking obstacles by the horns...being a go-getter...even just being able to loosen up and have a little fun sans paranoia, etc.
god i have been so sheltered my whole like...so naieve...my mom has kept me in a box and when it counted she belittled me to keep me there.
it's really hard for me to deal with this. i feel weak and like i don't have the skills i need [and should have by now!] to move on with my life.
i'm not trying to blame my problems all on my mom. i know it's sounding like that. i understand that i'm responsible for myself...or do i? maybe that's the issue at hand.
and therapy just gives me a place to whine and impress my therapist. it all comes down to talk. that's what i am. i'm all talk.
botton line is, i need to grow up and get strong.
low self esteem is the fucking preventative attribute to end all preventative attributes.
god i have been so sheltered my whole like...so naieve...my mom has kept me in a box and when it counted she belittled me to keep me there.
it's really hard for me to deal with this. i feel weak and like i don't have the skills i need [and should have by now!] to move on with my life.
i'm not trying to blame my problems all on my mom. i know it's sounding like that. i understand that i'm responsible for myself...or do i? maybe that's the issue at hand.
and therapy just gives me a place to whine and impress my therapist. it all comes down to talk. that's what i am. i'm all talk.
botton line is, i need to grow up and get strong.
low self esteem is the fucking preventative attribute to end all preventative attributes.
If I start mass prodcuing them I'll let you know.