mephausto

i could have stayed there, in the place where the fingertip rested so on the neck, on the back

i could have lingered between waking and dreaming, with ducking head and full eyes making me wish for longer nights of summer air over sheet covered bodies just thinking and whispering in the dark, a conversation for hours on what could be and what always is

but it's just a big sigh as the wind takes you away, my mind full and melancholy, the wave perhaps having crashed, swept up now and pulled out to navigate deep water once more

...

i really can't find the words
sorry
my mind is filling up the more i try and think
the party was both wonderful and crazy
and i had a moment where i found what i might be looking for
found a place
just for a moment
where there were dreams
comfort
possibility
imagination
i won't tell you where it was
and it was only there for a moment
it simply reminded me that things are still possible
no matter how far away from them that i feel

and still these words come out shitty
who knows
fuck
who knows

ps 4/28 daytime i've decided this conflagration of emotion has officially worn me out, pulled me in too many directions, so hefty doses of relaxation are now called for. it's all been too wonderful, so in order to not increase my asshole factor i'm pushing the clutch in and shifting to laid back, slow, and easy. i'm already running the risk of feeling too serious; i have to remember that things, no matter how deep and moving, are inherently absurd and possibly wholly unreal to begin with, so i might as well enjoi.

feel free to stop by and join me.